Author: Holly Mae Haddock

Categories
Mental Health Wellness

Should You Keep a Journal This Year?

Journal. Diary. Blog. Archive. Memoir.

There is a myriad of names for the timeless act of recording your daily thoughts and feelings, but is it right for you? Maybe you’ve tried it before, but it didn’t feel right, or maybe you never have. With so many variables in journaling styles, it’s easy to get it wrong and dismiss the whole thing entirely. There are also so many ways to get it right, and the near-infinite nature of journaling styles means that there’s sure to be one that feels good for you.

So, Should I Journal?

The quick answer is yes. There are countless benefits to clearing out your mental dust bunnies. Your critical thinking skills, emotional processing, and trauma response are all likely to improve when you spend time with your thoughts and feelings. But it can feel stressful to begin, and to select the method that feels most healing for your personal journey. No matter how you journal, your process can benefit from remembering to WRITE:
–

What do you want to write about?
Reflect on the feelings, desires and thoughts surrounding the topic.
Investigate those emotive responses through your writing.
Time yourself.
Exit with introspection.

Whether you elect to structure your journaling, create an artistic element or just sit down with a page and let your thoughts pour out as they arrive, there is healing to be found in becoming an emotional scribe.

Science Says Yes

Even the most free-flowing styles of journaling offer benefits that drive you toward not just setting goals, but achieving them. Supporting recovery in all manners is more effective when you allow yourself to take up space, and spending time in your own head validates that.

Engaging with your thoughts can help you process them, and processing them allows meaningful change to occur not just within that thought, but others like it as you move through life. It is not a stagnant indulgence. Journaling promotes active learning through reflection and can lead to better emotional processing, perspective-taking, and critical thinking skills.

Even If It Hurts a Little

While it can be uncomfortable to spend time with those painful realities taking up space in your mind, there is much to learn from them and your strength will only increase from confronting them. Connecting authentically with your emotions and processing them are keystones in recovery. Learning new methods to dispel old tendencies can be difficult or even painful, but learning is growing.

Connecting to your thoughts and emotions, making space for them, and having the opportunity to be honest with yourself are priceless tools toward healing. Journaling offers you a record of this growth and accountability that may be otherwise easy to discount or overlook. Whether you are setting goals, spending time with your gratitude or just spilling your heart on the page, that record will illustrate the strides you make.

What Should You Write?

Anything. There’s no wrong answer here, because this is yours and yours alone. But if the infinite possibility of emotional exploration feels a little (a lot) overwhelming, here are some topics to get you started:

    • Dear future me,
    • Write a letter to someone you love.
    • Make a “yes” list and a “no” list.
    • How are you really? (and don’t filter it)
    • Recall a memory that made you feel powerful and write in detail.

There are healing prompts or explore something more imaginative. If none of these strike your fancy- feel free to just write. Writing when you aren’t bound by structure, sense or concept can be freeing. Stream of consciousness journaling may surprise even you.

There’s No Wrong Way to Journal

It truly is that simple and that profound. Just like your recovery, this healing experience through your emotional mind is all yours. It is bespoke. Created for you, by you, and you can’t get it wrong. You cannot fail. But you can grow. Your words can change your world, and there is no limit on the change you can be in the world.

With the therapeutic benefit of healing in mind, body, and soul, you can move through the process of recovery feeling capable. Journaling can lead the charge for change and healing. But both start from within and do not require profound skills or tools to begin. Put pen to paper or letter to screen. Put thought to word and just write.

Categories
Mental Health

How 2020 Will Shape Our Mental Health

The beginning of 2020 brought about the end of a decade – a time to reflect on the past and create hopes and dreams for the future. However, we quickly learned that this year was not likely to make good on the promise and hopes we set. Instead, 2020 taught us to stay flexible and adapt, and through enduring many trials, it reminded us of just how strong we are. As we near the end of 2020, we again set our sights on the year to come, closing the chapter on a year that has been fraught with many stressors, both planned and unplanned.

The Coronavirus Pandemic

As the virus drew national and international attention in its spread to all corners of the globe, our response to it has moved through many stages as our ability to cope has been tested.

The Unrest Begins

The first wave – the onset of the virus – created an environment full of fear and uncertainty about how our lives would be affected and for how long. From that fertile ground quickly rose seeds of dissent, anger, and frustration about how others handled themselves during this time and the extent of the precautions they were (or were not) taking.

The messaging shifted very quickly, encouraging us to “look at the bright side” and seek opportunities for growth and advantages offered by this worldwide reset. Lurking underneath this mask of our “new normal,” however, there still existed plenty of distress: depression, hopelessness, anxiety, insomnia, and for some, traumatic stress, and suicidal thoughts.

On August 14th, 2020, a CDC study reported that 40% of US adults reported symptoms of depression, anxiety, or increased substance use, with 10.7% reporting having suicidal thoughts in the past 30 days. This represented a substantial increase from past studies.

Stress Continues

As the pandemic has worn on and we watch “the numbers” rise, our sense of helplessness has become difficult to counter in the face of the year’s many challenges. The losses we suffered began to stack up. Starting with a worldwide shift that called for us to stay at home, facing necessary adaptations to age-old traditions, economic unrest, educational changes, workplace reform, and disconnection from those around us, we have arrived at is a completely changed way of life.

This changed way of life has led to many new stressors: many Americans have lost their homes, jobs, and businesses, just as they have also lost their standard ways of coping with it. What is more, many young adults lost their identity as goals they had worked years towards achieving were lost to the pandemic. Even for those where the real casualties have been minimal, many of these factors’ cumulative stress creates profound effects.

The Vulnerable Among Us

While everyone is understandably affected by the virus, some communities remained disproportionately vulnerable to its effects, including Blacks, Hispanics, the elderly, people of lower socioeconomic status of all races, and health care workers.

For them, this is a crisis of physical health and takes a toll on their mental health. From these conditions, three months into the pandemic, the Black Lives Matter movement reignited and brought further unrest and unease to our already tenuous state.

Further on into the year, as we prepared for a 2020 presidential election, even basic public health strategies such as testing, quarantining, and wearing masks have become politicized. Civil political discussions moved to a hostile online environment, and we feel distant and unrecognizable to those with an opposing view.

Substance Misuse and Our Mental Health

The pandemic challenges exist in isolating us from others and the very solutions to deal with our stresses. In protecting our physical health, social distancing, and stay-at-home measures deeply affected our mental health. This is especially true for those with substance use disorders or those who are in recovery from them.

We have learned time and time again from speakers such as Johann Hari that the opposite of addiction is not sobriety; it is human connection. The strain of isolation takes a particular toll on us, whether our problematic relationship with substances began before or after the pandemic started.

Those who already were in active addiction – now isolated from their support services – have begun to use their pre-programmed coping skill to deal with the new stresses they face. Those who may not previously have had a problem have now found themselves reliant on alcohol or other drugs to make it through the day, to calm their anxieties, or to pass the time.

Hope in 2020 and Beyond

Although the challenges of this time are genuine, it is essential to realize that while the ways you may have traditionally received support are no longer available, the counseling and treatment world has adapted right along with the virus. We understand intimately the losses associated with this pandemic: the loss of life, of how we do things, and of when things were more comfortable.

However, those of us in the recovery community are also no stranger to learning to adapt and learning to carve out a new way of life for ourselves. We are familiar with making the difficult choice to avoid numbing, exploring our past, and walking the path that will lead us to experience happiness and fulfillment ultimately.

At Villa Kali Ma, we want to hold onto hope for you that things will get better, and with clinical expertise and holistic healing methods, we want to show you the way. Contact us today to learn more about our trauma-informed and sustainable treatment programs.

Categories
Love

To Date or Not to Date While in Early Recovery

What Has Love Got to Do With It?

It is usual for many people in the early stages of recovery to desire a romantic relationship. It may feel lonely and isolating, as previous relationships you have had may no longer be intact, both romantic and otherwise. Understandably, there is a longing to connect with others during this new phase and rebuild your life, which, for many, includes a romantic partner.

However, most experts and researchers say that those in recovery should wait at least a year before entering into a new relationship. This can seem like a very long time, especially for someone who is looking for connection and companionship and who in many ways has just lost the most significant relationship in their life (the addiction). That being said, it is essential to recognize the potential challenges of entering a new romantic relationship. Consider the following before deciding to pursue a relationship during the first year of recovery.

Early Recovery Is a Time to Rediscover Yourself

The first year of recovery is a time of profound self-discovery and healing. This is the time to create new healthy practices and become settled into a daily routine that establishes habits that help you to thrive while living sober. This is the time when you are rediscovering how to live —mind, body, and spirit— free from the clutches of addiction.

During early recovery, your focus is your sobriety, which takes significant energy and time. It would not be comfortable and distracting to maintain a relationship simultaneously. Balancing the multiple priorities of sober-living and tending to the relational needs could feel like a juggling act.

This is a time to get to know yourself, your true self, without the effects of substances. Developing your identity and loving yourself for who you are is crucial during early recovery and an essential personal journey to explore before bringing a partner into your life.

Recovery Is a Time for Healing

Recovery is an incredibly emotional journey, and it is essential to learn to manage these emotions and develop healthy coping skills at the beginning stages of sobriety. Entering a relationship is added stress that may hinder your full focus on maintaining sober-living and continuing the recovery process.

While it may feel good to find someone to invest your time and energy into, it is essential to notice this temptation for what it is: a distraction. Even if you find someone who may be further along in their recovery, and even if they operate as a source of support in your life, the energy and focus you invest in the relationship takes away from the actual task at hand: healing.

It’s essential also to acknowledge the reality that for many women who have fallen into addiction to alcohol or other drugs, many come from a background of chronic childhood abuse, and nearly 80 percent have a history of sexual assault, physical assault, or both. Healing this type of trauma requires time and a singular focus on your feelings of empowerment and reprocessing these experiences in healthy ways.

Relationship Woes

Even the strongest relationships encounter challenging and difficult moments. When this occurs, self-soothing is vital. However, if someone is in the early stages of recovery, it may be tempting to utilize substances to cope and comfort when emotions run high.

It takes a lot of time and practice to rely on healthy techniques and skills learned during treatment to manage discomfort. It may be more difficult to utilize these skills during the early stages of recovery. There has not been much time to practice them, and the compulsion to use substances to alleviate any relationship hardship may still be present.

Replacing Substances With Love

It is also common for some people to turn to relationships as a replacement addiction. Neurologically, the chemicals released during a new and exciting relationship mirror the chemicals released when using substances. Suppose someone in recovery loses focus of healing from the underlying issues that led to substance use in the first place.

In that case, the new relationship may be a replacement for their previous substance use. It can be difficult to challenge the limiting beliefs contributing to maladaptive patterns if someone is distracted from a new relationship’s exhilaration.

Focusing on Your Sobriety While Choosing Not to Date

It can be challenging to refrain from dating during early recovery – here are some tips to help you stay focused on your sobriety if you choose to wait to enter a relationship until later stages of recovery.

    • Develop a support network of friends, family, and colleagues that you can count on to provide encouragement and companionship.
    • Engage in healthy activities to occupy your time. Work on your personal goals and spend time enjoying your favorite leisure activities!
    • Find a sober accountability partner who is also committed to refraining from dating. You can plan weekly activities together to have fun while also helping each other stay focused.

Your health and recovery are a priority – ensure you are caring for yourself in the best way you can! At Villa Kali Ma, we know the importance of relationships in your life, romantic and otherwise. Within our program, we invite you to explore the intertwining impacts that love and relationships have on your desire to self-medicate. Give us a call to learn more!

Categories
Mental Health Wellness

Surviving the Holidays: Navigating Post-Election Conversations

For months, people have been enduring an onslaught of news coverage surrounding the election, as well as many strong differing viewpoints. It can be exhausting to take in all this information and fight for your voice to be heard. Likely, people reading this share a heavy sigh that the election and the holidays must be so close together.

Some get-togethers have family members split down the middle with differing hopes for the election result, leading to potentially awkward or downright confrontational moments. Being mindful of your needs and approaching this time is essential for your wellness and perhaps your relationships.

Feeling Divided

The atmosphere between pre-and post-election has felt tense and almost irreparable. However, remaining in the relationships we care dearly about is essential, as is not walking around with an “elephant in the room” for the entirety of the holidays. If you would like to hold some dialogue with your friends and family about your view, consider these tips for difficult conversations throughout the holidays.

Know Your Goal

Before entering any political conversation, identify what you are hoping to gain or learn from the exchange. When talking to someone with a different viewpoint, know that it is doubtful you will change their mind with one conversation. Maybe you seek to be understood or to understand them better, or you may enjoy a respectful debate.

If your goal is to “win” the argument or prove that you are right, it is likely that the conversation elements will be very triggering to you and will not ultimately help you feel more connected to others. Proceed cautiously, both with yours and others’ intentions for the conversation in mind. Consider abstaining from discussions with others that you know will not stay respectful and divide you further.

Be Self-Aware

Remember that you are not in control of what someone else says, but how you react to them. Notice your tone, volume, body posture, and how you are feeling internally. Our nonverbal communication makes up a considerable portion of how others perceive your message, so check in to make sure it lines up with what you are trying to communicate.

Also, make sure to check in with your physical body. If you feel your heart rate rising or muscles clenching, that could be a sign to take a step back to cool off. Stay present with yourself and excuse yourself from the conversation if or when it gets to be too much. You might want to try some grounding techniques before excusing yourself from the conversation entirely.

Avoid Tactics That Build Defensiveness

Be careful about labeling, using sarcasm, name-calling, or dismissing someone. When a person feels attacked, their defense mechanisms will likely flare up, and having a genuine conversation will be almost impossible. These types of interactions also do not feel good on either side.

A good rule of thumb for conversations where you disagree is to try to understand the very best parts of their viewpoint, rather than taking demeaning shots at policies that they may not even agree with. Remember that you are talking to a person, not taking down a political party.

It is not helpful to the conversation when you regurgitate the talking points fed to you by media sources on either side. The person in front of you likely has a more detailed understanding of their political beliefs that is not helpful when you paint them into a corner based on party lines.

Listen Actively

Instead of crafting your perfect argument in your head when the other person speaks, take the time to listen and make sure you are understanding the point that they are trying to make. Please do not make the mistake of thinking that you already know what they are going to say. You are still free to disagree after, but this helps slow down the conversation and makes it less about people shouting facts or talking points at one another.

The golden rule of communication applies here, too: you need to listen before you speak. Before you move into trying to disprove their points, if you can stay curious about why they believe what they do, this helps set the conversation up for success and avoids creating defensiveness that comes from feeling misunderstood on either side.

Consider Your Limits

You may have found yourself in a conversation that feels out of hand, whether you started it or maybe discovered your way into it by mistake. Know when to end a conversation to keep yourself and your emotional health safe. See the boundaries section below for ways to help with this.

Notice the Triggers

The holidays often can be a significant trigger to drink. For one, there is usually easily accessible wine, beer, or other alcohol at gatherings. Often, drinking is normalized because we celebrate the season or the end of the year (especially this one). This time of year, there is also excellent potential for others to offer drinks unknowingly or knowingly to people working towards recovery.

In 2020, although in-person gatherings are much smaller, the temptation to drink is still very present. This is also a time when people tend to regress to a more childlike dynamic with their family. Some coping mechanisms from childhood could be to dissociate, take risks, or become combative. All of these can bring down the inhibitions and raise the temptation to drink or use drugs.

With the added factor of family members sharing views that are often emotionally triggering, this can create the perfect storm for relapse. Going into events with this in mind can help to prevent slip-ups and keep you on track towards your goals. Consider if being around or speaking to a specific person is a good idea for you and set boundaries where needed.

Suppose you will be in a potentially triggering situation; set up sober support to call at a particular time to check-in. Also, practicing saying “no” could help people who may offer you drinks. It can also be useful to have a non-alcoholic drink in hand to avoid these conversations. Taking care of yourself and working on recovery skills before these interactions can also make a huge difference!

Plan Your Boundaries

Depending on your household, you could be going into a very challenging holiday season this election year. Consider whether you do not want politics to be brought up at all and whether this is a boundary your family would respect. Having this conversation before the event could help lessen potential unwanted conflict. You may talk about this by saying something like:

“While we’re together, I want to focus on all the things we have in common rather than to get stuck in the places where we disagree.”

“I think it might be best if we save political conversations for behind closed doors, as I know this is an area of potential conflict for us as a family.”

This may not be a possibility depending on your family. Consider these boundary options to ensure that you care for yourself in the holidays instead of disappearing inside yourself or saying things you might regret. Use this boundary checklist as a guide.

1. Find a Teammate

Is there someone at the gathering or on-call which your values align with? Talk to this person to see if you can make a game plan. If you are stuck in an uncomfortable conversation with Uncle Bob, can they pull you away? They could touch your shoulder if they see you getting elevated. Discuss ways you could support each other over the holidays.

2. Consider Who You are Talking To

Some people are in a place to have difficult conversations, and others may start in attack mode. Watch out for people who may be trying to bait you into an argument with a mean or outlandish statement. If the person you are talking to is not receptive or is lost in their opinion, think of ways to shut it down instead of engaging.

3. Create a Phrase

Practice a statement to say to end conversations for situations when you do not want to discuss politics or would like to stop a conversation you are in. Creating a blanket statement that you have said before can help when you feel overwhelmed to get out quickly. If the other person continues the conversation, it is okay to be a broken record. Your phrase might be something like, “I’m not sure this conversation is helpful to our relationship,” or anything that conveys a similar message in a respectful but firm way.

4. Have an Escape Plan

Potentially there could be statements said that are very much against your values. In some situations, you may even feel attacked despite your best efforts. If you have tried to set boundaries and continue to be crossed, have a plan to leave, take a break, or be in a private room.

If you need support with the emotional toll of the holidays this season, Villa Kali Ma is here to help. Reach out today to talk about how we can support you or your loved ones during the holidays and beyond.

Categories
Nutrition

Raw Chocolate Truffle Balls (Organic! Healthy! Low Fat! Delicious!)

These Raw Chocolate Truffle Balls are delicious, nutritious, and super easy to make.

One day a couple of months ago, I opened the refrigerator at Villa Kali Ma and found a plate of these Raw Truffle Balls sitting there, and immediately I thought, “Wow! These look amazing! Most likely loaded with saturated fat and sugar, but I have to have one!” I bit into it and was like, “oh yeah, these are decadent, probably made with melted chocolate and coconut cream.” Then I asked our Vegan Chef Jenny what was in them and I couldn’t believe her reply……. “only two ingredients……. dates and cacao”!

To make these tasty treats, only two ingredients are necessary, but you can always add more to it and get creative. You can make them into extreme “Superfood” balls if you like, adding things like Hemp or Spirulina, but they are already super nutritious with just the two main ingredients.

1. Organic Raw Cacao Powder

 Many health practitioners and nutritionists have touted organic Raw Cacao as a superfood, and many research studies have revealed the various benefits of this compound. Cacao is a delicious source of many minerals vital to our health, such as magnesium, iron, manganese, copper, zinc, and phosphorus.  Most clients who come to us to begin their recovery journey are also suffering from deficiencies in vitamins and minerals due to poor diets and the repeated ingestion of toxins that deplete the body of nutrients. Because of this, we like to ensure that all the meals and snacks served at Villa Kali Ma are not only delicious but are also loaded with health-boosting benefits.

Raw Cacao also contains chemical compounds that increase our ability to focus and improve our memory and raise endorphins in our brain, which helps us feel good. It contains Flavanols, which are known to increase nitric oxide in the blood, which improves the function of our arteries and blood vessels, reducing the risk of heart attack and stroke and improving the blood supply to the brain. Other benefits include reduced inflammation, lower blood pressure and cholesterol, and improved blood sugar levels.

And last but not least, the flavanols in cacao have been shown to act as a natural mood stabilizer, reducing stress and increasing calmness and sense of wellbeing while lowering anxiety and symptoms of depression.

2. Organic Dates

For this recipe, we used Organic Medjool Dates, which naturally contain various vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that positively affect your health. Dates supply vitamins and minerals such as iron, potassium, B vitamins, copper, magnesium, manganese, and calcium, as well as a significant amount of fiber.

The variety of antioxidants present in Medjool Dates have been studied and shown to lower LDL Cholesterol (the bad type) and prevent plaque in arteries, which reduces the risk of heart attack and stroke. This rich source of antioxidants also fights against damage caused by free radicals, which can lead to heart and brain diseases and cancer. Animal studies show that the antioxidants present in dates lead to lower inflammatory markers and decreased brain plaque present in those that end up with Alzheimer’s disease. 

Medjool dates also contain more calcium than any other type of date, and provide a healthy dietary fiber source that promotes healthy digestion, vitally important for overall health and wellbeing. Our clients at Villa Kali Ma are usually detoxing off substances, including alcohol, which leaves them craving sweets to fill the void. Most people will reach for things like candy, cakes, ice cream, or doughnuts when experiencing withdrawal symptoms, but here at Villa Kali Ma, we help them meet that craving with deliciously sweet but healthy alternatives.

Additional ingredients are optional but definitely make it more fun and appealing. You could add extra ingredients to the dough before rolling, such as organic unsweetened shredded coconut or sea salt; you can experiment with multiple different organic flavorings or extracts such as vanilla, almond, orange, cherry, mint, rose, hazelnut, pistachio, etc. Coat the exterior of the Truffle Balls in all your favorite toppings! The possibilities are endless, and it’s so easy to be creative with this recipe! 

Enjoy!

Raw Chocolate Truffle Balls

Time: About 1 Hour
The recipe makes about 20 balls 1 1/2 inches in diameter.

Ingredients:

2 packed Cups of Fresh Organic Medjool Dates
1 Cup Organic Cacao Powder (Extra for rolling the balls in if desired)

Optional Organic Coatings: Macadamia Nuts, Walnuts, Pistachios, Hazelnuts, Pecans, Toasted Pumpkin Seeds, Cacao Nibs, Goji Berries, Toasted Coconut, Hemp Seeds, Toasted Sesame Seeds, Cacao Powder, Berry Powder, etc.

*For firmer textured Truffles, add 3 tablespoons of Coconut Flour. For richer, more decadent truffles, add 1 tablespoon of coconut oil. (This is not necessary, and I did not add it to any of the Truffle Balls pictured in this recipe.)

Instructions:

First, remove the seeds from the dates, place them in a bowl, and pour enough (boiling) water to cover and soak for 10-15 minutes to soften the dates for easier blending. (If your dates are very soft and gooey, you can skip this step)

While dates are soaking, you can prepare your desired coatings. I use small bowls and a chopper (like a Slap-Chop) to prepare each of the coatings. I chop each of the coating ingredients I want to use and place them in separate bowls. You can also combine some of the toppings if you want a combo topping. For example, I used a mix of toasted coconut and macadamia nuts in one bowl, goji berry and cacao nibs in another bowl, and toasted pumpkin and sunflower seeds toasted coconut in another. Be creative and make your own coating mixes! 

After soaking, drain all the water out of the dates and place them in a high-speed blender or food processor (I use a Vitamix). Now add the Cacao powder 1/4 cup simultaneously, blending until smooth and fully incorporated each time before adding more. You may need to use a rubber spatula to scrape the sides to ensure all the powder is absorbed into the date blend. If using a Vitamix, you will need to use the plunger through the lid hole to continue pushing the dates down into the blade. 

Once it is thoroughly blended and all of the cacao has been added, you should have a thick gooey dough-like texture. If your blend is not thick enough or you would like your truffles to be more firm than soft, you can blend in up to 3 tablespoons of coconut flour to firm it up. If you want a more decadent Truffle, you can now add the coconut oil. 

Once you’ve completed the blending process, use the rubber spatula to scrape all of the mixes out into a bowl. Using a teaspoon, scoop out a heaping teaspoon of dough, enough to make a 1-1/2 inch ball, and drop it into the coating of your choice. Sprinkle some of the coatings on the top and then press the dough into the coating mix on all sides till coated, then roll the ball in the palms of your hands to make it round. Continue until all of your Truffles are coated, and then place them in the refrigerator to firm up. Store Truffles in the refrigerator for up to one week, or you can freeze them for up to one month. 

Even though these Truffle Balls taste sinful and decadent, you can enjoy these healthy treats completely guilt-free anytime you have a craving for something sweet or if you want a little extra fuel to keep you moving on a busy day!

The options are limitless with this recipe!
Categories
Mental Health

Seven Steps to Self-Forgiveness

You can’t forgive without loving. And I do not mean sentimentality. I do not mean mush.
I mean having enough courage to stand up and say, ‘I forgive. I’m finished with it.’

— MAYA ANGELOU

In general, as a culture, we have become so good at striving for success and recognition, and at the same time so bad at dealing with missteps and mistakes, especially our own. We understand the concept that “everyone makes mistakes” and that theoretically, “it is not about the fact that we made a mistake, but how we recover from it.” However, this is an incredibly difficult belief to hold on to when facing our own shortcomings or failures.

Many people struggle with self-condemnation that stems from feeling as though they’ve either done something “wrong” and have guilt related to how they acted, or because they feel that they themselves are “wrong” or defective in some way which leads to a sense of shame. For those who develop a problematic relationship with alcohol or other substances, these experiences of guilt and shame are universal.

The ability to find forgiveness for self is in so many ways the key to the healing process. In life, as with the process of recovery, true freedom comes once you find it within yourself to let go— to offer yourself the cleansing relief that comes with moving on and like the quote above, having the courage to love yourself enough to be finished with it.

The Road to Self-Forgiveness

Learning how to accept ownership over mistakes, let go, move on, and forgive yourself is important for mental health and well-being, although often it is much easier said than done. Self-forgiveness requires empathy, compassion, kindness, and understanding, and ultimately, requires you to make the choice to be honest with yourself throughout the process.

1. Setting Aside Time to Process

One of the biggest traps that we fall into as humans is believing that if we are not actively thinking about something that it is not a problem for us. Rather than dealing with our emotions, we tend to disregard them, “stuff them down”, or avoid them entirely.

When you are trying to create a new life for yourself free from the influence of substances, nothing can quite stunt your progress as this tendency. We need time to sit with ourselves and to acknowledge and process all the emotions that arise in us. Allow yourself permission to recognize and accept the feelings that are triggered in you as you think about where your life has taken you so far.

2. Acknowledging What Happened

Facing the realities of what you have done in the past or what has happened is an important step towards self-forgiveness. It is often our initial temptation to make excuses or to try to rationalize or justify our actions in order to make them seem acceptable.

However, by taking responsibility and owning up to the fact that you have engaged in actions that have hurt others, you can begin to free yourself – and them – from some of the burdens. It is also helpful to adopt the narrative that “I did the best I could with the tools and knowledge I had at the time”. In this way, we can balance the forces of accountability and compassion and develop a realistic perspective of what happened.

3. Considering What You Have Learned From the Experience

It can be a helpful exercise to consider each mistake of the past as a learning experience that helps you to discover more about the person you want to be in the future. This is the primary function of guilt as an emotion.

When we feel guilty, this is a message from our subconscious mind letting us know that our actions are not in line with our beliefs and ultimately helps us to make a different choice in the future. Progress looks like moving away from shame-based beliefs about the self:

    • “I am a bad person” and moving towards a more hopeful narrative.
    • “I made a bad choice, but I have the power to make better choices in the future.”
    • Or even just “I’ve experienced an incredibly painful lesson in who I don’t want to be.”

4. Having a Conversation With Your Inner Critic

Moving towards self-forgiveness means developing an active practice of self-compassion. In addition to learning to be kind to ourselves, this means taking a closer look at the internal dialogues that we allow to take place in our minds. An actionable step you can take is to write out a conversation between you and your inner critic as a way to recognize the thoughts that are getting in the way of forgiveness. This can help you identify thought patterns that are sabotaging your ability to forgive yourself.

You may also need to examine the expectations and standards you hold for yourself. The expert on self-compassion, Kristin Neff recommends considering your situation as if your best friend were the one in crisis. What would you say? How would you comfort them? Ultimately, how is that conversation compared to the one you had earlier with your inner critic? Why is it so difficult to extend the same message of love and forgiveness to ourselves?

5. Making a Plan for Moving Forward

Making amends is an important part of forgiveness, even when the person you are forgiving is yourself. The best way to move past your guilt is to take action to make up for your mistakes. While we may never “earn” forgiveness or fully make up for it, apologizing or even being willing to have the conversation with others about their experience is an important step. This aspect of self-forgiveness is about responding to what happened in a way that you can be proud of, no matter whether others ultimately accept your apology.

6. Quit Playing the Tape

While in many ways, it is human nature to spend time and energy replaying our mistakes, at some point, it becomes no longer healthy for us to continue in that way. Falling into the trap of rumination, self-hatred, or even pity can be incredibly damaging to your recovery process.

When you catch yourself playing the “I’m broken” or “I’m a horrible human” tape, stop yourself and focus on one positive action step. Interrupting the thought pattern can help you replace the negative experience and even reduce stress and anxiety.

7. Focusing on Today and the Hope of Tomorrow

Self-forgiveness is incredibly important to the healing process as it allows you to let go of the anger, guilt, shame, sadness you may be holding on to and move on. Working through this process gives you a plan for the future, rather than allowing self-defeating thoughts to continue plaguing you.

As you learn to identify what you are feeling, tame your inner critic, and work towards a different outcome, you will begin to see how freeing forgiveness can be. The power of forgiveness is in being able to offer yourself that gift, to accept it, and to step into the hope that tomorrow will be different.

Healing at Villa Kali Ma

When it comes to processing through your past, this is the work of therapy—to learn to offer yourself forgiveness, to sit with your pain and emotion, and move through it. At Villa Kali Ma, we know the importance of the relationship you develop with yourself on the recovery journey, as well as the challenges of meeting your inner critic face-to-face.

In addition to working with you through the process of self-forgiveness, we teach you the skills of mindfulness, of how to stay present in your experience, and how to offer yourself self-compassion along the way. If you or an important woman in your life is struggling with addiction to alcohol or other substances, contact us today to learn more about our program and how we can help!

Categories
Mental Health

The Trap of Isolation

For some of us, the pain of loneliness and the trap of isolation begins gradually. Friends move away, begin having families, or throw themselves into their new business venture or into advancing their career. For others, the pain is felt abruptly: leaving for college, moving, or starting a new job, or losing a partner to death or divorce.

Any of these events may cause you to re-evaluate the state of your relationships and the state of your standing Friday night plans in front of the television. In the last year especially, experiencing any of the above has likely only been heightened by the disconnected and polarized post-COVID world we now live in.

As the pandemic and the themes of social isolation have become a regular part of our daily vocabulary, it is only highlighted our need to reach out and feel connected to those around us. Still, while it may feel like this is a unique problem in the light of the recent events of today, the truth is that loneliness has been an emerging problem over the last decade.

Where Loneliness and Isolation Takes Root

Even those who are surrounded by others throughout the day have the potential to face a deep and pervasive sense of loneliness. You may even be married or in a long-term relationship and still not be able to escape that gnawing feeling inside.

Whether this is from a lack of true authenticity in your relationships -which may stem from hiding your struggle with alcohol, or the deep sense of shame you carry- or even the absence of another physical presence at home, we can feel isolated all the same.

The seeds of loneliness, when allowed room to grow, can have serious consequences for our physical and mental health. In addition to physical ailments like diabetes, hypertension, obesity, cardiovascular and autoimmune diseases, loneliness also contributes to depression, alcohol abuse, sleep problems, and even personality disorders.

Is Society to Blame for Our Isolation?

In general, shifts in our culture have also seemed to pave the way for this trend towards isolation. In public, rare is it that we will engage in conversation with others. In the waiting room, in line, at restaurants, etc., opportunities for connection have been replaced with an opportunity to send some emails, catch up on the latest podcast, listen to music, or otherwise occupy our minds with mindless activity.

In effect, we learn to rely on our smartphones out of a misguided attempt to protect ourselves from the unknowns of what a social encounter might bring. This being an election year, it is also fair to say that political polarization may be another reason that you may feel isolated and disconnected from others, even online. Especially online. When we curate our social networks and leave little room for interacting with others who hold -or might hold- opposing beliefs, we limit our opportunities for meaningful connection.

How Loneliness Entraps Us

Loneliness thrives within a self-defeating psychology that once it has taken root can make it difficult to escape its clutches. Complicating matters more, lonely people are likely to fall into some predictable traps that only serve to maintain rather than help them overcome their loneliness.

1. We Get Stuck in Negative Thinking

Our perceptions become altered so that we view our existing relationships more negatively and pessimistically. We make assumptions about others (that they do not like us or will reject us) and rely on these excuses to explain our lack of initiative or follow through when it comes to making plans.

2. We Believe Our Own Lies

As a result of our negative thinking, our own reactions and avoidance pushes others away even further. In our blindness to our role in creating the distance, we see others’ withdrawal as confirmation of our fears, and become even more convinced they no longer care about us. Often, complicating the pattern even more, to deal with the pain that stems from our faulty beliefs, we may turn to alcohol or prescription pills to cope.

3. Our Lies Become Truth

The more socially isolated we become, the less use we have for social and relationship skills, which will eventually wither away over time. If things go badly when we try to connect with others, rather than viewing the attempt as an opportunity to rebuild those skill sets, we see it as further confirmation of our undesirability.

Played out in this typical pattern, our loneliness becomes very visible to others who are likely to label us as less interesting and may not make efforts to connect, especially once we become equally entrapped in the cycle of addiction.

How to Break Free From Loneliness

The tricky part about breaking the cycle of loneliness and isolation is that it requires vulnerability, or a leap of faith in one way or another. We need to initially retrain our brains to see ourselves as desirable and worthy of connection, and then take action steps based on those newfound beliefs.

1. Remember Your Worth

The biggest hurdle to overcome in breaking the cycle of loneliness is your fear of rejection. This is the voice of shame in your life telling you that you are not good enough, that you are broken, or that if others only knew the truth about you, they wouldn’t stick around. While many of us may feel justified in those beliefs based on past experiences, we must have the courage to put ourselves out there again.

2. Take Initiative

For you, this may look like opening up to those who are already in your life but kept at a distance. It may look like sharing small pieces of yourself with others and giving them the benefit of the doubt that they will show up for you. It may also look like just getting out of the house: volunteering, taking up a new outdoor hobby, or scheduling a video chat to catch up with friends you have not seen in a while.

3. Approach Yourself and Others With Optimism

Get to know the cycle of self-doubt that starts to creep in when you socialize or make plans and learn to soothe it. Speak to that part of you with love and kindness, “Thank you for trying to protect me, but you’re not needed at this moment”. Take that leap of faith, and trust that when you can rein in your greatest enemy (your thoughts) you will be able to see yourself more clearly.

A loving, safe, and supportive recovery community helps heal all wounds. If you find yourself isolating from others and self-medicating your pain with prescription pills, drugs or alcohol, we want to invite you to discover true holistic healing in a treatment environment that speaks to every part of you, and helps you become the best version of yourself. Reach out to us today to learn more about our healing programs here at Villa Kali Ma!

Categories
Mental Health

Yes, Women Have Specific Needs in Substance Abuse Treatment

There are unique differences between women and men who seek out treatment for substance abuse. More than the obvious biological differences, there are social and environmental factors to consider as well. In treatment, we as women require a safe space where we can reconnect with ourselves and heal our connection to the divine feminine energy and power within us.

For many women, this becomes a very difficult task when men are present. Many treatment centers are based on models of substance abuse that have been created for men. In fact, most of the literature and research that has been conducted in the past has been based on males. It has not been until recently that women’s needs have been taken into account with regard to substance abuse treatment.

Many women seeking treatment have been hiding their pain and stuffing their emotions while continuing to be the primary caregiver in their families. In keeping up their family, job, and community roles and commitments while ignoring their own needs, they can fall deeper and deeper into substance use to cope. This can go on for decades as women deny their divine feminine and try to “man up” and keep up appearances, even when they are breaking inside.

These women’s needs would be best served in a program committed to honoring and recognizing the divine feminine power within each woman. They need to heal in an environment that helps each individual woman reconnect to the power of her most sacred self.  The journey of true recovery most often looks different for women than for men and thus, women need to be in a program that recognizes and provides for these differences.

Unique Challenges Women Face in Treatment and Recovery

From the start, women face different challenges than men that impact both why and how their substance abuse develops. In addition, women internalize different expectations from society and their community and are more likely to experience instances of sexual victimization and trauma than their male counterparts. This impacts what each gender needs to feel safe, heard, and eventually heal from the cycles of addiction.

Relationships

Relationships are a key factor explaining why women seek help for substance abuse. Many women may have initially fallen into substance abuse as a means to cope with an abusive relationship or due to drugs and alcohol being a key part of past relationships. However, many of these women choose to seek healing only once the goodwill in those relationships has run dry, and they find themselves out of options.

Others may desire to seek help in order to take steps in the opposite direction: so they can form healthier relationships in their lives and heal the attachment injuries that are stopping them from doing so. This process may also require addressing underlying love addictions or patterns of choosing toxic and abusive partners for themselves.

Pregnancy

Women are unique in their ability to give life. Although not all women have had this opportunity, it is still a key difference between men and women. Issues around pregnancy can be a motivating factor for some to seek treatment. For some women who have lost children due to substance abuse or other challenges in life, this can be a key element that is addressed in treatment. Connecting back to the womb, to the mother of all things can be part of any woman’s healing journey.

Parenting

Along the same lines, children can be a motivating factor for women to seek treatment but they can also be the reason they do not out of fear of losing them. Women often internalize more stigma and stereotypes than men when it comes to struggling with substance abuse and are often more fearful about being seen as “unfit” mothers. Mothers often carry with them a lot of shame and guilt for bringing their children with them along the road of addiction —something which can only be healed with self-forgiveness and love.

Co-Occurring Disorders

More women than men who seek substance abuse treatment suffer from multiple disorders. This means that in addition to their substance abuse, they may also be fighting the demons of:

    • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
    • Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD)
    • Bipolar disorder
    • Major depression
    • Borderline personality disorder (BPD)
    • Eating disorders

It is important that all disorders be addressed and treated at the same time. This can be incredibly difficult, and we need to help women recognize that they have the power,  strength, and resilience it takes to battle all these forces at once. More often than not, these disorders are linked in origin, in that many women have used substances to self-medicate, to help them cope with the underlying mental health challenges.

Thus, healing involves learning how to cope without the aid of familiar substances. It is important that women feel safe talking about their internal battles and this is best done with people they feel most safe with. Although men can also struggle with co-occurring disorders, it is not as common and most may not be able to relate in the same depth.

Trauma

Many women who seek substance abuse treatment have experienced physical and/or sexual abuse. The trauma that women experience is often different than men and needs to be addressed sensitively and safely so it can be healed. For many women, it can be the shame and pain from these traumatic experiences that fuel their desire to numb with substances. To get to the root of these traumatic experiences one has to be vulnerable and open, which can be difficult to do in the presence of the opposite sex. Many women may have experienced abuse at the hands of their previous male partners or family members.

If males are present in the treatment setting, women may feel too triggered or just not safe enough to open up and be vulnerable in a way that would allow them to process the trauma and receive the support and guidance they need. In order to face their trauma and heal it, there needs to be a supportive community of other women that can create a safe container free of judgment or potential for re-traumatization. Women supporting each other through the journey of healing creates an opportunity to see that we are not alone and our situation is not unique.

Many of us have experienced the same kinds of suffering and together we can learn new coping skills and experience a transformation from being victims of trauma to becoming empowered survivors of trauma. Seeking treatment for substance abuse can be a daunting experience and women should focus on their specific needs and prioritize the importance of a “safe container” in a therapeutic environment in order to ensure progress toward the goal of recovery. Women only treatment centers recognize the unique challenges women face in our society when it comes to substance abuse and other co-occurring issues.

Women-specific programming is essential in creating a therapeutic treatment approach that is tailored to address the unique needs of women and will provide them with the best care possible. In order to succeed, women need to connect back to their true authentic selves and be seen and validated in an environment that is empathetic to the specific challenges that women alone face.  This breaks down to one essential truth; women do have specific needs in substance abuse treatment and these needs are better met in a gender-specific environment.

Categories
Nutrition

Indulgence in Mindful Eating: Ayurvedic Spiced Pancakes With Sliced Peach and Blueberry Sauce

Pancakes are an all-time favorite comfort food for many, reminding us of the good old days when mom (or dad!) would get up early on the weekends and make a pancake breakfast for the family. If your mom was anything like mine, this breakfast usually included bacon with eggs that were fried in the bacon grease, pancakes cooked in butter and slathered with butter after cooking, then topped with Mrs. Butterworth’s or Log Cabin maple-flavored syrup-like substance made from artificial flavorings and high fructose corn syrup. Yum!

As a kid I thought this was awesome! Anything sweet, buttery or fried tasted great to me. Now that I am all grown up and more educated on diet and the role it plays in my long-term health; I am more mindful about my food choices. However, I still find ways to make amazing and delicious versions of my favorite comfort foods that taste as sinful and decadent as the stuff mom used to make.

Nowadays, when I’m in the mood for something comforting and self-indulgent for breakfast (or sometimes dinner!), I might mix up a batch of pancakes with some fresh and yummy organic toppings. Although I know going in that it’s going to be an indulgence, I am mindful of what ingredients I use and how they will affect my health and wellbeing. The recipe I am sharing here is a perfect combination of healthy and deliciously decadent.

Even though I always use organic non-GMO ingredients, pancakes topped with syrup is still going to be a high glycemic load, so to slow down the sugar spike we need to add fiber, protein and healthy fats. We can achieve this by adding some organic old-fashioned oats, ground flax, hemp hearts, pumpkin and sunflower seeds and toasted coconut flakes, as well as using coconut oil instead of butter to cook our pancakes. If you like, you can also add protein powder in the mix.

I usually use a scoop (1/4 C) of hemp protein powder and a little extra water if it makes the batter too thick. For our topping, we will use peaches and blueberries, which are both low on the glycemic index. For this recipe I used what I had on-hand at the time. You can be creative and use whatever ingredients you have but try to be mindful of the impact of each ingredient. When I first began changing my diet and trying to eat healthier, sometimes I couldn’t resist putting my old favorites in there, like butter and sugar.

But after learning to substitute healthier ingredients and testing the finished products, I realized that I didn’t need to add the unhealthy stuff to make it taste good. This is the beginning of mindful eating. We have to experiment and be willing to give up our addiction to our habitual ways of eating and try new things. We can use this recipe as a mindfulness practice by paying attention to each ingredient that we will use and mindfully listening to our inner voice and noticing what happens during our process.

Just keep your attention in the present moment and follow the recipe, beginning with the gathering of the ingredients, then the mixing of the ingredients, then the cooking of the pancakes and the topping, then to the assembly of your beautiful masterpiece, and finally to the experience of tasting and eating it, slowly enjoying every bite. The Ayurvedic spices we use in this recipe not only boost the intensity of pleasure you get from tasting it, but also boost your health!

Cardamom is great for boosting your digestion and is also used in Ayurveda to reduce gas and bloating.

Cinnamon is used in Ayurveda to increase the bioavailability of nutrients in foods and also acts as an anti-inflammatory and is used to balance the digestive system and pacify stomach issues.

Turmeric is well known for its anti-inflammatory properties and in Ayurveda it is widely used in many ways such as detoxifying the liver, balancing cholesterol, fighting allergies, stimulating digestion, boosting immunity and improving the complexion of the skin.

Nutmeg is used in Ayurveda to stimulate the appetite and boost the digestive fire. Its power is derived from its intense aroma.

In Ayurvedic medicine, the digestive system is the root of all imbalance in the body, and problems with the digestive system lead to disease in the tissues and organs. Stagnation in the system is not good for your health so Ayurveda uses many spices and herbs to insure healthy digestion. The combination of delicious healthful ingredients and Ayurvedic spices in this recipe will not only taste amazing but will serve your mind body and soul with a beautiful blissful experience.

This concoction of mouthwatering ingredients, along with the divine aroma of the Ayurvedic spice mix will wow your senses and send you into a state of taste bud bliss! Enjoy! Breath, live, love, move, eat, grow. Learn, let go, and transform!
–

Shopping List

TIP: Buy everything organic.

    • Healthy Organic Non-GMO Pancake Mix: The “just add water” type if possible but the flax will replace the egg if the mix calls for it (eggs are not healthy, they are proven to be linked to heart disease, cancer, diabetes and early death, look it up). I used Birch Benders Organic because I had it on hand. Bob’s Red Mill Organic 7-Grain Pancake Mix is good and very low in sugar.
    • Ground flax seed meal.
    • Organic old-fashioned oats or grandy oats super hemp granola (the former if you are wanting to cut the sugar intake, the later will add 4 grams of sugar to your recipe).
    • Ground spices: cardamom, turmeric, nutmeg, cinnamon.
    • Vanilla extract.
    • 100% pure organic maple syrup.
    • Fresh peach or peaches depending on how many you are cooking for. I used ½ of a small peach for one person.
    • Organic blueberries: ½ cup per person.
    • Fresh mint (optional but amazing).
    • Celtic sea salt or himalayan pink salt.
    • Raw or toasted unsalted sunflower seeds and pumpkin seeds (I toast the seeds myself in a dry sauté pan on medium heat, keep shaking and tossing until they are toasted).
    • Organic unsweetened coconut flakes (I toast these in a dry pan on the stove top just like I did the seeds. You can also just buy already toasted unsweetened coconut flakes).
    • Ayurvedic spiced pancakes with fresh peach and blueberry sauce.
    • Recipe is for one serving and makes three 5-6 inch pancakes.

FOR THE PANCAKES

    • ¾ cup organic pancake mix (reduce to ½ cup if using old-fashioned oats instead of granola).
    • 2 tablespoons of ground flax meal (I grind whole flax seeds in my coffee grinder).
    • ¼ cup of grandy oats super hemp coconola granola OR ¼ cup of old-fashioned oats (no instant oatmeal).
    • 2 pinches of ground cardamom.
    • 1 pinch of turmeric.
    • 1 pinch of nutmeg.
    • 1 pinch of cinnamon.
    • ¾ cup of water (a little more if needed for batter consistency when using oats).
    • ½ teaspoon of coconut oil.

Mix all of the ingredients together in a bowl and let stand for at least 5 minutes to thicken. Meanwhile, heat a large non-stick skillet or griddle over medium to medium low heat. Once the skillet is hot add the coconut oil and tilt the pan to spread it around. Now pour your batter in and make three even pancakes. You might need to use 2 pans if you don’t have one big enough for 3 pancakes. You should use all of the batter for the 3 pancakes.

Cook until edges are lightly browning and bubbles form all across the top surface of the pancake, then flip and cook on the other side until done. This takes about 5-7 minutes total, depending on the type of heat you have on your stove. While the pancakes are cooking you can make your topping.

FOR THE SAUCE

    • 2 tablespoons of pure 100% organic maple syrup.
    • ½ of fresh organic peach with seed removed, sliced into thin slices.
    • ½ cup of fresh organic blueberries.
    • 1 pinch of ground cardamom.
    • 1 tiny pinch of salt.
    • ½ teaspoon of vanilla extract.

Put all of the ingredients except the vanilla extract into a saucepan and heat it on medium heat, stirring occasionally until sauce is bubbly and turning blue. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla extract.

FOR THE TOPPINGS

    • ½ tablespoon of toasted pumpkin seeds.
    • ½ tablespoon of toasted sunflower seeds.
    • 1 tablespoon of toasted coconut flakes.
    • 1 teaspoon of hemp hearts.
    • 2-3 fresh mint leaves.

Build Your Pancake Masterpiece

Stack your pancakes on your plate and spoon the fruit out with a slotted spoon and place on top of your stack. Then sprinkle your seeds and hemp hearts over your fruit and pancakes. Then sprinkle your coconut flakes on top of the fruit and garnish with the mint leaves. You can pour the remaining sauce in the plate around your pancakes or pour over the top, however you like.

Once you have finished preparing the pancakes and you’ve plated and topped them with all the ingredients, sit down and prepare to mindfully enjoy each bite. Get all of your senses involved. See the beauty of what you have created, notice the colors and textures and how each ingredient has amazing individualized qualities. Smell the unique and special gifts from mother nature collaborating in this delicious combination of aromas. Taste all of the flavors together and individually. Notice the textures in your mouth and on your tongue. Savor and appreciate this experience as just one of the gifts and blessings of life on Earth.

Enjoy life to the fullest! Be grateful! Choose wisely! Live long! Be healthy!

Categories
Mental Health Spirituality

Understanding the Mind-Body Connection in Addiction Recovery

Understanding the intricacies of our mind-body connection is so incredibly important to the goal of treating and healing women from the destruction of substance abuse in all aspects of their lives, mind, body and soul. Although we often think of the mind and body to be separate, they are actually deeply connected, and it is essential to address both in addiction treatment. Attention to each system in the body is necessary for true, holistic healing and recovery.

Again, to overcome any addiction, the mind and body have to both be addressed. However, in order to achieve lasting, sustainable recovery, there also requires specific attention to the processes of the soul. In order for true recovery to take place, we must understand and heal this triadic connection, which can be done through several different techniques that can be called upon to access and draw focus to these varied parts of us and bring them into alignment.

What Is the Mind-Body Connection?

Everything you think in your mind, your beliefs, values, emotions, memories, and habits influence both your mental and physical health. We know from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), that what we think affects what we feel, which in turn affects how we act. We also know that the opposite is true, that how we act – and in essence, our physical being – affects how we feel and think. We can easily feel this connection when we focus on specific thoughts and pay attention to our experience of them in the body.

When we think about being worried, stressed, or scared we can feel unease in the stomach, tension throughout the body, a racing heart, and shallow breathing. These thought patterns and emotions have a corresponding biological function and can contribute to imbalances within the body. Because our physical and mental health is so connected, to heal any disease or discomfort we need to approach both to re-establish balance and health.

Addiction and the Mind-Body Connection

Addiction finds a foothold in that it impacts the reward areas of the mind and body, allowing us to feel good or euphoric for a short period of time. Whether it is used as a way to numb the uncomfortable sensations that connect to past pain and trauma or simply as a way to relax, through the process of our increasing tolerance and our desire to avoid withdrawal symptoms, our body soon becomes physically addicted.

Psychologically, we become addicted when we turn to substances each time we feel stressed or overwhelmed with life circumstances. Thus, addiction is neither a solely biological or psychological construct, it is both.

Trying to Escape the Mind and Body

Our emotions and experiences of trauma are not just stored in the mind but also the body. This is why many people feel their body has betrayed them as it holds onto the left-over pain from the past. Our addiction often functions as a way to escape the uncomfortable mental and bodily experience of emotional pain and discomfort.

Our natural instinct is to try to escape it as we do not understand how to heal this split. To heal emotional pain, we have to find safety and learn how to connect with others and soothe ourselves in a safe and healthy way. This is where having body-focused techniques that help us to stay present as well as a supportive environment and someone to guide us becomes invaluable.

Healing the Mind-Body Connection

Since these two systems are interconnected, when we focus on one it influences the other. If we focus on nourishing the body through exercise, healthy food, and healing mindful breath, it impacts our mind, making it clearer and more focused. Many holistic approaches help to heal these systems and release our dependence on our addictive behaviors and thus make it easier to move through recovery successfully. When our mind and body come back into balance, we reconnect to our true self and often to our spirituality as well.

This part of us is often buried when we are being controlled by our addiction and a desire to self-medicate. Bringing balance back to the mind and body allows us to once again take control of our life from a loving and caring heart-centered space. For centuries, traditional forms of medicine have looked to address the whole person, not just a part. Many treatment programs only address the mind and miss out on the healing potential of the body. Fewer still capitalize on the healing potential of the soul.

At Villa Kali Ma, our holistic approaches don’t just address the disease or addiction, but include avenues to access the mind, body, and soul and heal all the parts of us that have become separated in order to restore the whole system. In addition to clinical approaches, we pull from ancient healing modalities such as Ayurveda, Yoga, and Shamanic practices that are built on this philosophy. Check out our blog on holistic healing techniques to learn more!

Exit mobile version
Skip to content