I used to suffer from an extreme sense of impending doom. I was either worrying about the future or I was filled with self-judgement and shame about the past. I was never at peace. I didn’t even know that peace was a possible state of mind. I learned that through the practice of yoga and meditation, I can train my mind to dwell in the reality of my life, not the story that my mind was repeating to me over and over, ad nauseam.
Immediately upon getting sober, reality set in, and all of the pain that I had been avoiding through self-medicating hit me like a freight train. I was plunged into all the feelings I had been trying to keep myself from feeling or even acknowledging. Intense regret, remorse, self-hatred, shame, and despair took over my thoughts. All I wanted was relief from these thoughts and feelings but I knew my old ways of coping didn’t work for me anymore.
I began learning how to train my mind by practicing yoga and meditation several times a week. I found that during these practices I felt more calm and peaceful than any other time of the day. I began studying the principals and philosophy of the ancient yogic teachings and adopted them as a new way of living my life. The teachings gave me a new perspective to see life from. I learned how to dwell in the present moment, not the past or the future.
I also took an online course called “Innner Engineering” from a indian mystic named Sadhguru which really help train my mind and got me started down the path to healing my life. Then I learned to train my mind and redirect my thinking by reading books and listening to audio CD’s while driving in my car. The one’s that helped me the most are Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now” and “The New Earth”, Wayne Dyer’s “The Power of Intention”, Michael Singer’s “The Untethered Soul”, and Anita Moorjani’s “Dying to be Me”.
These teachers showed me the way to freedom from the constant barrage of negative thinking that had been my life long habit. Through these teachings and through the practice of yoga and meditation, I now live in a completely different world from the one I used to live in. I am able to take life on life’s terms and enjoy it. I love my life now! Even though I don’t have everything I want, I am grateful for my most precious gift…Peace of mind!
I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes from Eckhart Tolle:
“Are you worried? Do you have many ‘what if’ thoughts? You are identified with your mind, which is projecting itself into an imaginary future situation and creating fear. There is no way you can cope with such a situation, because it doesn’t exist. It’s a mental phantom.”
Remember…you are creating your future with your thoughts today, so make them good thoughts!!
Peace & Many Blessings,