Category: Alcohol Addiction

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

5 Types of Alcoholics

As long as alcohol has been brewed, some percentage of the population has ruined their lives over it. The archetype of the alcoholic, who goes mad for spirits, losing house and home for an unquenchable thirst, has existed for a long time.

In recent decades, new information has emerged suggesting that there are at least five clearly identifiable subtypes of alcoholics, expanding our collective image of the alcoholic to include the marginal zones that may guide the entry into full-bore alcoholism.

This lens comes from a joint national clinical study by the National Institute Of Health (NIH), the National Institute On Alcohol Abuse And Alcoholism (NIAAA), and the National Epidemiological Survey On Alcohol And Related Conditions (NESARC). After conducting a wide survey of existing material, researchers grouped their findings into five subtypes of alcoholics:

  • Functional subtype
  • Young adult subtype
  • Young antisocial subtype
  • Intermediate familial subtype
  • Chronic severe subtype

The criteria for sorting alcoholics into subtypes were: current age, age of starting drinking, age of becoming dependent on alcohol, family history, and co-occurring mental health disorders.

These subtypes are meant to assist in further examination and exploration of the social phenomenon of alcoholism, rather than for diagnostic purposes. In this post, we here at Villa Kali Ma will take a closer look at these proposed subtypes, for the purposes of raising consciousness and sparking discussion.

Functional Subtype

The phrase “functional alcoholic” is popularly used to describe people who have alcohol dependence, but do not encounter severe outer world life consequences for it. This subtype is estimated to make up almost 20% of current alcoholics. The age of this group is, on average, early 40s, comprised of people who started drinking after the age of 18, and whose dependence on alcohol appears in their late 30s.

Although the functional alcoholic is believed not to have consequences of use, that’s not exactly true, as they usually suffer from moderate levels of depression. This type may smoke cigarettes, but most probably don’t use other drugs. More male than female (60% male, 40% female), members of this group are among the more likely of alcoholics to be married.

The functional subtype is least likely of all alcoholics to have legal issues, and most likely have higher levels of education and income. On the outside, people in this subtype appear to be fine and their alcoholism may be hard to detect and diagnose due to the lack of dramatic life consequences.

People in this subtype are less likely to reach out for help, but when they do they tend to go to 12 Step and/or with a private therapist or mental health provider.

Young Adult Subtype

The largest subtype is made up of young adults, representing about 30% of alcoholics. This group begins drinking alcohol at around the age of 19, with alcohol dependence manifesting in their early 20s.

This group has lower rates of co-occurring mental illness, are moderately likely to have addiction to substances other than alcohol too, and are moderately likely to have family members who are also addicted to alcohol.

This subtype is the most likely of all alcoholics to be in college, unlikely to be employed full-time, and unlikely to be married.

Although this subtype drinks less frequently, when they do drink, it is excessive. There are 2.5 times more men than women in this subtype, and they are unlikely to seek treatment. If they do seek treatment, they are most likely to go to 12-step.

Young Antisocial Subtype

The young antisocial subtype represents about 20% of alcoholics. This group starts drinking at the youngest age of all subtypes, at around the age of 15 and develops dependence at the earliest age (around age 18).

About 50% of this subtype would meet criteria for a co-occurring mental health diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder (linked to criminalized behaviors). This group also has high incidences of social phobia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, bipolar disorder, and depression. This group is also most likely to have addiction to other substances in addition to alcohol, including meth, cocaine, opioids, marijuana, and tobacco. This subtype is more than 75% male.

This group has the lowest levels of higher education, employment, and income. This group is the highest likely to seek out substance abuse treatment and to go to 12-step.

Intermediate Familial Subtype

The intermediate familial subtype, a little less than 20% of alcoholics, starts drinking around age 17, developing alcohol dependence by their early 30s.

This subgroup has a high likelihood of co-occurring mental illness, including bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, depression, or antisocial personality. This group has high rates of co-occurring addiction to cigarettes, marijuana, and cocaine. This group is likely (but not the most likely) to have immediate family members with alcoholism.

This subtype is estimated to be 64% male, with higher education than some subtypes but not as high as the functional subtype. This subtype tends to be employed, more so than other subtypes but is also likely to earn less than the functional subtype.

This is not a subtype that is especially likely to seek treatment, but when people in this subtype do seek help, they go to 12-step, substance abuse treatment programs, including detox facilities, and to private health care.

Chronic Severe Subtype

The smallest percentage of alcoholics is represented by the chronic severe subtype, comprising around 10% of alcoholics. This subtype starts drinking at around age 15, becoming dependent around the age they turn 30. This group is most likely among subtypes to be addicted to a secondary substance like cocaine, opioids, marijuana, and cigarettes, alongside their alcohol dependence.

More than 75% of alcoholics in this group have close family members who are also alcoholics, making them the most likely of all subtypes to have alcoholism as a preexisting issue in the family.

Almost half of this subtype show symptoms and traits of antisocial personality disorder, second highest after the young antisocial subtype. This group is most likely of all subtypes to exhibit serious mental health problems, including major depression, bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety, social phobia, panic disorder, or dysthymia.

This group most closely resembles the known archetype of an alcoholic: 80-90% of people in this group are likely to make serious efforts to cut down, to experience withdrawals when they try to do so, to find it very difficult or impossible to stop drinking and to drink in spite of serious life consequences.

This group reduces their participation in activities due to their drinking, spends large amounts of time recovering from their alcohol use, and is most likely of all subtypes to have to go to the emergency room because of their drinking.

Rates of divorce and separation are highest amongst this subtype. Rates of education and employment are lowest. This group drinks most frequently of all subtypes, though their total intake is less than that of the young antisocial subtype.

More than 60% of this subtype have sought help for their alcoholism at least once, a rate of treatment-seeking which far exceeds any other subtype. When seeking treatment they go to 12-step, inpatient treatment (rehab), detox, and may also receive help from private physicians, psychiatrists, and social workers.

Villa Kali Ma’s Alcohol Addiction Treatment Program

The picture created by this research does not contradict what we see at Villa Kali Ma. We recognize these sub-archetypes as patterns overlaid on people we have known and loved, as well as people we have helped professionally.

We’ve worked with heartbreakingly vulnerable young women, coming to us from dangerous circumstances, who match the young antisocial description, all tough because they’ve had to be. We know these girls need healing, and a chance to be good.

We’ve also worked with college-age young women who want to stop their drinking because they don’t like how it feels to be losing their personal power to a substance. We see the light of their intelligence and help them have a chance to steer true and own themselves more fiercely.

We know well the secret pain of the functioning alcoholic, who seems ok on the outside but isn’t ok at all on the inside, where grief and anger simmer darkly. We know the searing family agony carried by the intermediate family subtype, who, whether they knew it or not, are here to get help not only for themselves but also for their kin.

Most of all we know the chronic severe cases, those tragic women meeting the wreckage that alcoholism eventually brings to all who don’t get out of its shadow in time.

If any of this resonates for you, or people you love, we want you to know that there are many, many success stories in every category. Gleaming, beautiful examples of unpredictably wonderful transformations, women who pulled themselves free, surrendered to a healing force and rose up stronger and brighter than anyone could have imagined.

Through hard work, yes, and the courage to give it all over, and through dedication that would impress a monk. But still, it is possible, and it is done, every day all over the world.

We also know this: no matter which subtype a woman might fall into, immediate intervention is the only known way to reduce the chance of greater heartache down the road.

If you are reading this blog for yourself, we encourage you to start your journey with that first step of reaching out and sharing out loud, that you know you have a problem.

Read more about how we help women, with our holistic alcohol treatment programs for women.

Villa Kali Ma can help women heal from alcoholism

At Villa Kali Ma, we specialize in healing women who are struggling with addiction.

We also treat mental illness and offer programs for addressing traumatization, one of the biggest causes of addiction in the first place.

Our signature approach to healing alcoholism, mental illness, and trauma is to blend evidence-based clinical approaches from the Western treatment model with ancient healing practices and modalities derived from yoga, Ayurveda, alternative medicine, and more.

Reach out to start a conversation about how we might help you find your path back to wholeness. Whether you relate to any of the subtypes of alcoholics described above, or none at all, we’re here to listen to what it’s like to be you.

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

A Guide to the Effects Alcoholic Mothers Have on Their Daughters

Every woman alive is a daughter. Daughterhood is a deep and archetypal condition, a form we fill out, each in our own ways. All mothers are daughters, too.

The relationship between mother and daughter is like no other. For better or worse, the mothers out of whose bodies and psyches we were forged will always be a source further upstream from us, a wellspring that feeds into our own lifestream.

For those of us with mothers who have also harmed us deeply, we know the peculiar bond braided from love, victimization, and dependency all at once. But nothing is unmixed, even the worst mothers give us something good – if only our own lives.

Those of us who feel mostly positive towards our mothers are still imprinted in such a way that we are forever influenced, and guided into being who we are now partly because of who she is or was.

We are all made out of our mothers. And our daughters are made out of us.

What is the effect an alcoholic mother can have on her daughter?

When a mother is an alcoholic, the effect of that alcoholism on her daughter follows a recognizable pattern. The patterns are predictable, as is the course of alcoholism itself.

Alcoholism shows up in different forms, but has one thing in common – whoever you once were, whoever you could have been, your original self is replaced with an alcoholic version of you.

Daughters of alcoholic mothers suffer greatly at the hands of the alcoholic version of their mother, whether by neglect of basic needs, psychological and physical abuse, exposure to danger, or just the unpredictability and inconsistency of people with addiction. Daughters of alcoholic mothers develop a recognizable syndrome, called “adult child of an alcoholic”, or ACOA.

A daughter of a mother who struggles with alcoholism is likely to:

  • have severe problems with self-esteem, struggling her whole life with guilt, shame, and self-blame
  • be anxious, depressed, and perfectionistic
  • have poor boundaries and internalize her anger (turn against herself rather than get mad at others)
  • develop behavioral health problems (substance addiction, eating disorders, and/or other kinds of self-harm)
  • be diagnosed with a mental illness (panic disorder, generalized anxiety, major depression, ADHD, and so on)
  • have a codependent relationship style, and/or be attracted to partners who also have addiction problems
  • have an ambivalent, avoidant, or disordered attachment style

Codependency, a concept very closely linked to ACOAs, is a kind of psychological syndrome reflecting the dependent child’s adaptation to her mother’s illness.

Codependency is characterized by psychological fusion and role confusion, wherein the child becomes “parentified” and roles get reversed so that in some domains the child meets the parent’s needs rather than the other way around.

In codependent dynamics, a non-substance-addicted person, in this case, the daughter, takes on responsibility for the alcoholic’s life, trying to compensate for their pain, and most of all trying to control the addicted person’s unsafe, unpredictable, and toxic behavior. This enabling and “closeness” (which is actually unhealthy enmeshment) is confused for love.

What strong connection does a mother have with her daughter?

The bond between a mother and her daughter is the most impactful relationship the daughter will ever have. It is the starting place for a daughter, and like the beginning of a story, sets the stage for her hero’s journey.

All children live for a long time in the metaphorical kangaroo pouch of their mother’s psyches. Mothers and babies begin their relationship in a state of merge, a kind of oneness similar to being in love. It is a stage of deep bonding and imprint that can never be undone, no matter what else happens.

Whether that relationship is sweet or fraught, it is a state of fusion. Whatever is true in the mother’s psyche will be shared with her daughter directly, cell to cell, during this stage. A daughter is psychologically part of her mother for many years after the physical parting from her mother’s body at birth.

The process by which a daughter becomes her own being and no longer primarily sourced out of her mother’s body and being is gradual, going through many steps and stages of growth and separation. The individuation process may be said to take decades.

Even when a daughter’s mother has passed on out of the physical realm, the psychological memory and shaping of the mother will persist, as it is not only about the individual person who had the role of being our mother but also the larger archetype of mother, which is collective and universal.

How can a mother break the cycle of addiction?

It is important to know that we can retrieve ourselves from the prison of addiction. It is absolutely possible. It has been done many millions of times, as the large community of recovering people can tell you.

It also isn’t easy and demands that we rise to the occasion of our own lives. Believing ourselves worthy of redemption is hard if we do not value or love ourselves, which many of us don’t.

For many mothers, it may be through the portal of the pain of realizing their impact on their daughters, that they are given the gift of a true desire to change.

If you’re ready, here are the steps to breaking the cycle of addiction, so that what has hurt you, doesn’t go on to hurt more people:

1. Get professional help

It is very difficult to get sober and, more notably, to stay sober permanently, without a total renovation of body, mindset, and emotional habits. This is not a time to go it alone, but rather to get all the help you can.

Addiction is treatable, and recovery is absolutely possible, but it takes some doing. One-on-one psychotherapy, active and frequent participation in healing recovery groups, and behavioral skills training in learning not to react to one’s thoughts, emotions and urges are all generally necessary.

At Villa Kali Ma, we also feel that lifestyle transformations in terms of exercise, diet, and consciousness habits are supportive too. Either way, you can expect to re-envision or update almost everything about yourself and how you have approached life.


2. Educate yourself about the nature of the disease

Knowledge is power. The more we know about addiction and how it operates, the more swiftly we will be able to see it when it comes knocking on our door, asking for us to take it back, as it will most certainly do.

By learning all we can about the biology, psychology, sociology, and even spirituality of addiction and recovery, we will be gifted with more insight and compassion for ourselves, and be armed to the teeth to defend ourselves against relapse.


3. Get into community

Build a support network that is resilient and flexible, ideally made up of loving, wise souls who understand what you’re up against. If you’re not sure where to find such people, start by looking within the walls of recovery meetings like AA. Whether there, or in other communities, remember that actions speak louder than words, and vibration speaks the loudest. Look for the people whose faces are shining with peace and clarity, but who also feel real and relatable to you. Those who have no need to deny your darkness, but also have a source of light inside them, are your people.


4. Look into your Family History

Our lives, as personal as they feel to us, have strong similarities with our forebears. If we struggle with depression or alcoholism, it’s highly likely we’re not the first in our family to do so.

By looking into our family history, perhaps completing a genogram or drawing our family tree as best we can with the information we have, we can gain valuable insights and expand our compassion for ourselves and our whole family system. Understanding a pattern that is being played out in your life can bring enormous relief and help you make different choices.


5. Address the Trauma Factor

It’s important to know that trauma and addiction go together like a horse and carriage. Especially in women, addiction is very frequently rooted in traumatization, from events that took place in childhood or during adolescence, and/or from sexual violation of some kind. Trauma is difficult to recognize until you learn that what you took to be a “normal” state (eg chronic tension or dread) is actually the trauma itself. Getting dedicated help for healing trauma is very often the critical intervention that helps a woman break the cycle of addiction.

What treatment programs are offered for women struggling with alcoholism?

Gender-specific treatment is strongly advised, for women in particular. It is more effective for women to receive treatment among other women than it is for them to get help in mixed-gender settings.

This is for a variety of reasons, most of which stem from the ways that women relate to men, and whether or not women are able to feel physically and psychologically safe around men (and, of course, whether those men are psychologically and physically safe for women). All in all, for women it is preferable to be in a same-sex setting if you can find one that meets your needs.

Addiction treatment exists on a continuum of care, that starts with medically supervised detoxification in a hospital or hospital-like setting and gradually tapers down to outpatient levels of care. Most of these levels of care are available in women-only settings (such as what we at Villa Kali Ma provide).

The levels of care are:

Medically-supervised Detoxification

A short-term, hospital-like stay among medical professionals, who monitor your detoxification process to make sure you detox safely.


Partial Hospitalization

A hybrid treatment setting that retains a strong medical element in case needed, but also begins the treatment and rehabilitation process.


In-patient, or Residential treatment

Traditional rehabilitation setting, in which treatment is administered in a safe, sequestered environment away from normal life.


Intensive Outpatient Treatment

Another hybrid option provides a high level of structure and intensity of treatment services but in an outpatient setting.


Outpatient Treatment

The least intensive level of care is usually recommended as a step-down level for people who have completed higher levels of care.

Where you belong in the continuum of care depends on how long you have been drinking, how old you were when you began drinking, how much alcohol you have been drinking, how frequently you have been drinking, whether you also use prescriptions, and factors like these.

Which level of care you belong in should be determined together with a professional, with input from both of you about what may be needed and necessary in your case.

Villa Kali Ma offers all of the above levels of care in holistic women-only treatment settings.

What are the signs of alcoholism in women?

There are many tell-tale signs of alcoholism, ranging from physical signs, like liver problems, to psychological problems, like anxiety and depression.

The easiest indicator to recognize in oneself or another is out-of-control behavior related to drinking. The following signs can be helpful for recognition of the patterns:

1. Drinking More Than You Mean To in One Sitting

A common experience for people with alcoholism is an inability to set limits on one’s own drinking, within a given drinking event. For example, you may say to yourself, “I need to get up early tomorrow, so tonight I will have just one glass of wine with dinner”, but nevertheless you end up drinking several glasses. The difficulty stopping once started on a particular incidence of drinking, is a sign that alcohol has some growing power over your will.


2. Unable to Cut Down even when you have Good Reasons To

Many people decide at some point to stop drinking altogether for a while or to drink a little less, overall. It is a sign that alcoholism is at play if you find this to be very difficult or even impossible. If you cannot follow a resolution to not drink for a certain period of time, if you are struggling with your own willpower, this indicates alcoholism.


3. Craving alcohol

Women who have developed or are starting to develop alcoholism will experience cravings to drink which feel relatively strong, akin to hunger when you haven’t eaten or thirst when you’re dehydrated. It will feel almost like a bodily need, such as needing to rest when tired. Cravings to drink may kick in after emotional triggers or as a habit at a certain time of the day, as though your body is asking for it.


4. Feeling Bad when you don’t drink: aka withdrawals

Another telltale sign of alcoholism underway is if, in the absence of alcohol, you start to feel bad physically, mentally, and/or emotionally. This is the body withdrawing from alcohol. The pain can be as subtle as an uptick in unease or grumpiness, or it can be so severe that you can’t function normally due to headaches or trembling, and you find you need to consume some alcohol to return to your normal state. Eventually, withdrawals can become part of your daily life. Withdrawal symptoms include nausea, sweating, trembling, anxiety, headaches, and delirium.


5. Needing to drink more to get the same effect: tolerance

Tolerance is part of all substance addiction. Tolerance means that what used to be enough alcohol to make you drunk or get the relaxant effect you are after, is no longer sufficient, leading you to drink more and more to get the same effect. Eventually, alcoholics no longer get any pleasure or peace from drinking, and instead drink just to stave off the pain of withdrawals.

Why is it important for a mother to be a good role model for her daughter and for herself?

We believe that women matter. All women. Me, you, all of us here at Villa Kali Ma, all women everywhere.

If you’re a mother, don’t ever fall for the mean voice inside that says you don’t matter to your daughter. Even if it doesn’t seem like it, you matter more than you will ever know, and to your daughter most of all. A mother-daughter relationship is forever, and as long as you are both still here, in living, breathing bodies, you have a chance to start again.

Every daughter counts, and you’re a daughter too. You can be the mother that you need, and the mother your daughter needs, all in the same breath.

Villa Kali Ma can help women struggling with alcoholism

Villa Kali Ma offers addiction treatment and recovery programs for women who suffer from alcoholism, trauma, and/or mental health struggles. We welcome mothers, daughters, sisters, and all the women of this world, into the heart of our program of care. We are here to help you throw off the burdens of addiction and to claim your right to live fully and freely, as best you can, in the light that you actually already are.

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

What are the Emotional Effects of Alcohol?

There is a reason that nearly 12 million women in the United States alone qualify for an alcohol use disorder. The way that alcohol affects the mind, body, and mood is addictive, generating the phenomena of craving, tolerance, and withdrawal.

But how does alcohol affect our feelings? Any woman who has wrested her life back from the octopus arms of addiction will tell you: that alcohol starts out friendly, helping us feel more social, open, and relaxed. But before too long, alcohol amplifies shame, guilt, anger, stress, trauma, depression, and anxiety. For those who don’t get out of alcoholism’s grip in time, their last days are spent in pure insanity.

Read on for Villa Kali Ma’s exploration of how alcoholism takes away a woman’s ability to feel her feelings. All the more reason to devote ourselves, once again, to the bright, true path of recovery.

What are the emotional effects of alcohol?

Here are a few of the ways that alcohol makes us feel bad.

How Alcohol Affects Women with PTSD

There is a strong connection between traumatization and addiction. The link goes in both directions; women who drink are more likely to develop post-traumatic stress disorder than women who don’t, and women who already have PTSD or complex trauma are more likely to become addicted to substances, including alcohol.

Alcohol, like all addictive substances, has a negative interaction with trauma, causing greater levels of dissociation, intensity of traumatic memory, flashbacks, and reenactment compulsion. This is because alcohol further prevents the processing and release of traumatic memories, so the distress coming from damage to survival instincts, which people with PTSD must learn how to release, is doubly locked inside the body.


How Alcohol Interacts with Stress

For the same reasons that alcohol interacts negatively with traumatic stress, it also interacts negatively with everyday life stress, such as the stress associated with parenting and work. The body’s stress processing pathways – heart, stomach, breath, and nervous system – are deteriorated by alcohol. The consequences of alcoholism also bring more stressful events into a woman’s life, in the form of legal, financial, and relationship problems.


How Alcohol Interacts with Depression

Alcohol generates depression as a side effect, even though many women also use it to self-medicate their pre-existing depression. The longer-term impact on physiology is to reduce levels of happiness and good mood, through disrupting neurotransmitter and hormone production and circulation in the body, as well as re-routing patterns of brain and nervous system functioning.

Alcohol also depletes the body of vitamins, minerals, and nutrients, which are vital to the maintenance of positive mood. Alcohol gradually poisons the liver and sickens the body, such that the body’s ability to eliminate toxins is impaired.
Feeling ill in the body and having a heavy load of toxins and inflammation are both correlated with depression.


How Alcohol Interacts with Anxiety

Anxiety is a side effect of alcohol and a withdrawal symptom from alcohol. Women who turn to alcohol for its calming, relaxant, and socially lubricating effects have to eventually face the reverse impact when the body no longer has enough of the substance to recreate the effect.

The pattern of chronic anxiety is deepened through the repetitive use of alcohol, and alcohol gets in the way of the body’s ability to find nervous system healing through positive methods like exercise, nutrition, and meditation.


How Alcohol Interacts with Anger

We need boundaries that protect ourselves and others, and healthy anger can be part of recognizing a boundary. A temporary emotional state of anger can be used as a signal to take action to protect ourselves and other vulnerable who are counting on us to defend them, such as our children or pets.

Rage, on the other hand, is out of control, explosive anger that hurts ourselves and others. Rage is not helpful for resolving conflicts or getting our needs addressed. Rage is adversely affected by alcohol abuse. Women who abuse alcohol gradually become more and more rageful over time.


How Alcohol Affects a Woman’s Self-Esteem

Alcohol reinforces shame severely. Shame is the feeling that you don’t deserve to be loved or to belong in the group. It is one of the most difficult emotions to endure.

When you’re already depressed, angry, and anxious, the chronic and relentless shame that people with addiction feel can be a killer. Many women with substance use disorders take their own lives.

There is a stigma associated with addiction, and the life consequences of alcoholism, such as health problems, physical ravages, job loss, financial trouble, DUIs, loss of custody, and so on, are also stigmatized.


How Alcohol Affects Social Interactions

Alcoholism leads to social isolation. Due to the changes in personality that take place with alcoholism, sober people and moderate drinkers don’t want to be around us and we don’t want to be around them. It is hard for caring people to witness our self-destruction and not be able to do anything about it. All of these reasons, and more, lead to a loss of family, friends, and social belonging.


How Alcohol Affects Intimate Relationships

Alcohol corrodes intimacy. In addition to psychological impacts that generate more rage, stress, depression, and anxiety, alcoholics make bad choices, bringing on financial and legal trouble.

Alcohol is linked to domestic violence (for victims too), emotional volatility, fights, and reckless behavior, like crashing cars, infidelity, and spending sprees. People who love us may eventually leave for their own well-being. The people who stay with us get sick with codependency, which harms them considerably.

How does alcohol affect the human brain?

Alcohol is first absorbed into the blood and then transmitted to the brain. Once in the brain, alcohol affects our supply of neurotransmitters and hormones. These tiny chemical messengers are involved in regulating and balancing all vital systems. The connection between alcohol and menopause is particularly significant because hormonal fluctuations during menopause can amplify the effects of alcohol on neurotransmitters and overall mental health.

If we do not have enough of the right kinds of these molecules, many pathways are disrupted and thrown out of whack. Some neurotransmitters which are known to be disturbed by alcohol are GABA, serotonin, and dopamine.

A very simplified analogy for thinking about this is: that alcohol breaks into the storehouse of neurotransmitters and releases them artificially, thereby cheating the system and spending them when we haven’t yet earned them.

An alcohol-induced GABA spike creates sedation, and a release of concentrated dopamine feels like pleasure. Sedation and pleasure are addictive, leading us to want to drink alcohol again and again. When the physical toxicity and negative emotional impacts of alcohol kick in, we are liable to want that borrowed pleasure and sedation even more.

The problem with breaking into the storehouse is that the required levels of these transmitters are gone when we need them for other bodily operations.

These molecules are supposed to be used for operating the body, as well as for natural reward and relaxation processes. They are ordinarily released as a cascade when we are doing life-affirming activities: after exercise, sleep, emotional connection, creativity, and procreation. Normally, we would feel pleasure as a reward for behavior that is good for life (our own and other people’s).

For example, the natural pleasure that a mother and her baby feel when a mother is nursing her newborn, or that two people feel when falling in love, or which a grandmother feels while gardening in the sun, are hormonal and neurotransmitter cascades saying “yes, this is good for you”.

If we deplete our supply of biological reward hormones and neurotransmitters through using drugs and alcohol, we eventually aren’t able to feel enjoyment naturally anymore. This can all be restored through a life of recovery, but it takes some time to replenish after addiction.

What influences alcohol’s impact on your brain?

How much influence alcohol will have on your brain depends on how much exposure you have had. The amount of alcohol you drink, how often you drink, how old you were when you began drinking, and for how many years total you have been drinking, are all predictors of how much impact alcohol will have on your brain. More alcohol over the same period of time means more impact. Also, the earlier in your development you start using alcohol, the greater the impact.

Another factor to consider is your baseline physical and mental health. If you have a physical or mental illness, then alcohol has a greater impact on you.

What parts of the brain does alcohol affect?

Alcohol affects multiple centers in the brain that are connected to mood, motor control, thought, sensation, and decisions.

Alcohol inhibits some brain functions and stimulates other functions. The frontal lobe, which moderates aggressive behavior, helps us make rational decisions and overrides impulsive urges, is inhibited by alcohol and can be damaged.

Alcohol also stimulates the limbic system, explaining why it can make people feel happy, affectionate, and connected in the short term, but also why sadness and other more difficult emotions exist in abundance in alcoholics.

Alcohol-related brain damage in women

In recent decades the impact of chronic alcohol abuse on the brain has been studied more closely. Brain imaging reveals what appear to be areas of damage in the brains of alcoholics, in key centers related to emotion. These areas of brain damage corroborate the already observable phenomena of extreme mood swings and out-of-control behavior in alcoholics.

Women are more at risk of alcohol-related brain damage than men, due to our physiological differences. We are also more prone to experiencing blackouts, which harm short and long-term memory, showing up as shrinkage in function-specific centers of the brain. What this generally means for women is chronic problems with anxiety, depression, and anger, as well as difficulty with memory and decisions.

How does alcohol affect your mental health?

Mental health is deeply disrupted by alcohol. For people who have no pre-existing mental health problems, alcoholism instills them, bringing on depression, anxiety, and in later stages, psychosis. For people who have a pre-existing or co-occurring mental health problem, including trauma-related disorders, alcohol makes these worse, deepening them and interfering with healing them.

People with severe and chronic mental health problems, such as bipolar disorder and major depression, often use alcohol to self-medicate, but its impact is very destructive in the long run, aggravating both mania and depression.

Overcome the emotional effects of alcohol today!

When our emotions are working as nature intended, we have vivid, active hearts. Our emotions guide and comfort us. When joy comes, we feel it fully. We can also tolerate and pass through the tenderness of sorrow. We play the full, grand piano range of emotional notes.

All that makes life worth living, is recognized by how it feels. Alcohol takes this birthright from us. It darkens our hearts.

Through sobriety, it’s possible to start over. Villa Kali Ma is a unique, women-only holistic treatment provider, specializing in recovery from addiction, co-occurring mental health disorders, and/or trauma. If you’re looking to recover your right to feel good in your own heart, body, and mind, we’d love to work with you!

References:

https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/alcohols-effects-health/alcohol-topics/alcohol-facts-and-statistics/alcohol-use-disorder-aud-united-states-age-groups-and-demographic-characteristics

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

The Connection Between Menopause and Alcohol

Here at Villa Kali Ma, we celebrate women in every way. We love women fully, without any shade of reservation, as we are now.

Our love for women embraces many stages of life that all women pass through. One such stage of life is menopause, the window of development during which we turn from grown-ups into wisdom-keeping elders.

The present wider culture is stingy with its love for women. Its main attitude towards menopause is to trivialize it, pathologize it, or tease us about the messiness the process requires.

But we do not have to follow the cues of the wider culture, do we? We do not. Let us make our own music from the rhythms and harmonies we discover at play in our own lives, in the lives of women.

In a spirit of loving celebration of our maturing process, here is Villa Kali Ma’s guide to menopause, as it relates to our core topics of addiction, mental illness, and healing.

What is the connection between menopause and alcohol?

Menopause is achieved in the body through the operations of hormones, those indescribably tiny units of electrochemically alive substances that have such a big role in the body.

Alcohol is known to interfere with the natural health and operations of hormones, especially for women, who are more vulnerable biologically to alcohol’s many effects than men. Alcohol wipes out precious stores of needed hormones, makes others inert, causes some to be produced in overabundance, and so on.

When alcohol is relied upon for coping with the choppy waves of emotion that come with menopause, we get pulled into a trap, wherein we are always chasing, and never quite finding, a place of pause between hormonal swells.

If you, or someone you love, is getting entangled in the alcohol trap during menopause, you are not alone! This is a relatively commonplace struggle for women who feel unsupported or alone when called upon to face the many deepening questions that menopause asks of the body, mind, and spirit.

What is menopause?

Menopause is the clinical name for the transition that takes place when women exit the chapter of life in which they were biologically available to become pregnant and give birth to children (at least, the old-fashioned way).

Menopause is, notoriously, the season of life during which we experience hot flashes and mood swings, as well as bodily changes that affect our appearance and our feeling of who we are in the world.

Menopause usually takes place between the ages of 45 and 55, with the average age of menopause being 51. It is considered to have officially taken place once 12 months have gone by since the end of menstruation.

Hormonally speaking, menopause and perimenopause (the stage preceding menopause) involve a gradual reduction of naturally produced estrogen and progesterone, the two main hormones in women’s bodies.

Menopause is, no doubt, a highly biological experience, but it is also colored by many cultural influences. Its suffering is in part made up of how we feel about aging in general, but also the implications of the transformation of the female body to a form less admired within the dominant culture.

In many ways, menopause is closing to the chapter of life that was opened when we went through puberty as adolescents. Everything relating to the adult female body’s potential for bearing children, sexuality, and perceived appeal to others, is touched by this change.

What are the symptoms of menopause?

Menopause has physical impacts as well as emotional effects on women.

At the physical level, the change in hormones and their work in the body can show themselves in certain telltale signs. Here are some of the physical signals that changing hormones are affecting the body:

  • Menstrual irregularity
  • Hot flashes and night sweats
  • Sleep difficulties
  • Headaches
  • Weight changes
  • Itchiness and physical irritability
  • Changes in vaginal moisture and sexual arousal

At the level of emotions and thoughts, some common experiences for women during menopause include the following:

  • Mourning one’s past, greater awareness of one’s aging, and a feeling of limited remaining time
  • Nostalgia or regrets about how the past was spent
  • Lowered self-esteem, sadness, and depression due to changing physical appearance or other changes
  • Anger, moodiness, and irritability

How does menopause contribute to addiction?

Addiction is always a risk whenever overwhelmingly painful life experiences are encountered, and a woman has not yet had the chance to build up a reliable way of nourishing and comforting herself with healthy tools and habits. To struggle during menopause is enormously common – we all cope and do the best we can – and some of us will be more prone to falling for addiction’s false promises.

Some women may increase their use of prescription medication or start drinking more than she ever would have before menopause. Women who have had drinking or addiction problems in the past may find themselves more prone to be triggered to use again.

Both estrogen and progesterone interact with substance abuse and addiction. With both estrogen and progesterone levels fluctuating during menopause, this can influence subjective experiences of craving or desiring to use substances.

What drugs are most commonly abused by women on menopause?

Women who are pulled into substance abuse during menopause are most likely to use alcohol and/or prescription painkillers, both of which are highly addictive and harm the hormonal change process.

Alcohol and prescriptions tend to be used because they work in the short term to delay emotional and physical pain, which a woman may feel unprepared to process and experience.

It’s important to understand that such attempts to numb or avoid pain are signals from the psyche that help is needed. Rather than permitting substance abuse to carry on and cement into addiction, which is difficult to uproot once it has taken hold, one can instead decide to “get the message” and seek therapeutic support of some kind.

What are the side effects of addiction?

Addiction creates many problems and does not cure the pain of menopause. Rather, substance use interferes with and delays the adaptations the body is attempting to accomplish.

Menopause is a psychologically and sometimes physically difficult process, and ideally, women would have more support for going through it. It is easy to feel alone, depressed, and unsupported while it takes place.

Using substances, instead of helping, will generate a vicious cycle, making depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and menopause symptoms worse.

Instead of numbing the pain of menopause, therefore, it is highly suggested to find ways to nourish one’s body and soul during the process, with compassion and kindness for the truth of how difficult the experience is.

Some further side effects of addiction include:

  • Changes to the brain and nervous system, affecting executive functioning (ability to make decisions), loss of willpower and self-control
  • Intense cravings to use substances and increased levels of discomfort when not using substances, eventually leading to an inability to function normally without drugs or alcohol
  • Increased obsession with substances, managing use, and consequences of use
  • Change of personality to become more negative and unhealthy in thought and emotion, as well more as self-centered
  • Life consequences, such as job loss, financial and legal troubles, and erosion of relationships
  • Worsening of physical and mental health symptoms, including menopause symptoms

How to deal with severe menopause?

The pain of menopause can be taken as an invitation to greater intimacy with yourself and your needs. To learn to comfort and support yourself from within your own well of resources is ultimately a positive thing.

Likewise, taking constructive and self-responsible action on your own behalf to get help to heal emotionally and feel better physically, can be a transformation in lifestyle that brings many new gifts into your life.

As we learn to radically care for the female body and soul as it goes through these important shifts and changes, we come to a greater understanding of our own uniquely lovable life form.

Here are some ideas for further investigation, which we have found to be supportive for this time of a woman’s physical and emotional journey.

1. Exercise

There is a reason that exercise tops the list of natural health approaches. Moving the body to the point of feeling energized, relaxed, and spent in a good way, triggers the body’s self-restoration mechanisms. Vigorous exercise brings peace of mind, better sleep, and a healthy body.

Choose an exercise format that feels good to your body – as long as you are exhausting yourself through the exercise and gently pushing yourself to raise your fitness level each time you exercise, you will be amply rewarded in your hormonal and neurotransmitter functioning.


2. Diet

Every day, more research surfaces that shed light on the many ways that food affects our physical and mental lives. From gut health and inflammation to immunity and cognition, every circuit of the body is affected by what minerals, vitamins, and other substances we take in.

There are many diets to choose from, so investigate or consult a nutritionist, to find a diet that works for you. Generally speaking, fresh, organic, whole, and nutrient-dense foods will be the way to a feeling of clean, clear sustenance. Genetically modified organisms, added sugars, processed foods, packaged foods, additives, chemicals, and complex carbohydrates are generally suggested to be dropped away from the diet, as possible.


3. Get Support

It is unreasonable to ask that women go through the steep challenges of menopause without someone with whom we can confidentially express emotions. Whether in a support group, among friends, or with a therapist, secure a safe space for unfolding the truth of how you are experiencing your life, without any risk of judgment or pressure to conform. Your menopause is unique and yours to experience, and your emotions are valid.

Villa Kali Ma can help women dealing with menopause and alcoholism

Villa Kali Ma is dedicated to helping women heal, during the sacred window of menopause, and any other stage of life. We offer inpatient and outpatient programs treating substance abuse, mental health struggles, and trauma. If you’re struggling with addiction, mental health problems, or traumatization, while staring down this significant life transition, consider working with us. We’d love to help you find your way along the road.

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Alcohol Addiction

PCOS and Alcohol

Polycystic ovary syndrome, or polycystic ovarian syndrome, (PCOS), is a common endocrine disorder affecting women in their reproductive years. The name of the syndrome comes from accompanying cysts formed on the ovaries, though the cysts are not the cause of the disorder and aren’t always present.

Lifestyle choices that improve diet, sleep, mindfulness and exercise are the best ways to address PCOS naturally. Symptoms can be alleviated through eating differently, sleeping better, regulating the nervous system through meditation, and in general aligning more to nature’s cycles.

Diet includes beverages, such as alcohol. Women with PCOS might be wondering, does drinking alcohol affect my PCOS?

Does drinking alcohol make PCOS symptoms worse?

Regular alcohol intake can be a negative force in the story of any woman’s health, and PCOS is no exception.

One factor to consider is weight. The majority of women suffering with PCOS also struggle with weight, and find that their symptoms are helped by losing 5 to 10% of their body weight. Eliminating alcohol is one way to lose weight without having to eat a lot less.

Alcohol also affects blood sugar levels, which has an impact on insulin resistance. Insulin resistance is correlated to PCOS.

Insulin resistance means that a person’s body resists the effects of insulin. The body’s mechanism for lowering blood sugar levels works poorly, leading to the body producing extra insulin.

Increased insulin levels leads to an increase in androgen production, a hormone which all bodies need but which can exacerbate PCOS symptoms when in found in the body in excess. The increase in painful PCOS symptoms in turn can lead to cravings and affect healthy food choices, leading to excess food intake, therefore weight gain.

Women with PCOS tend to experience more depression, anxiety and stress. Alcohol contributes to depression, anxiety and stress, too, acutely during hangovers and also as a longer term effect.

Nonalcoholic fatty liver disease is correlated with PCOS. Women with PCOS have an increased prevalence of NAFLD. Although this condition isn’t caused by alcohol – it comes from high blood sugar levels, insulin resistance, obesity, and high levels of fats in the blood – alcohol makes NAFLD worse and people with NAFLD are advised not to drink alcohol at all, because of the potential for further liver damage.

Sleep disturbances are also linked to PCOS, as is alcohol. Given the critical importance of sleep to restoring all body systems, poor sleep caused by alcohol use is a risk factor for worsening PCOS symptoms, as well. Healthy patterns of sufficient sleep are a key way to reduce PCOS pain.

In sum, alcohol consumption can be said to affect PCOS negatively, making symptoms worse, through worsening insulin levels, sleep, mood, NAFLD and body weight.

Does alcohol affect insulin levels?

Insulin levels are impacted adversely by alcohol, because of the way that alcohol effects blood sugar.

Moderate alcohol intake causes blood sugar to rise, while excessive alcohol intake can cause blood sugar levels to crash, both of which further trigger imbalances which the body struggles to correct through manufacturing hormones in excess.

The hormone insulin helps regulate blood sugar in the body, keeping levels in the range of what is healthy for the body’s many complex and subtle operations.

In about half of women with PCOS, insulin resistance is a problem that’s contributing to painful symptoms. This means the body doesn’t respond to insulin as well as it could and therefore is producing an overabundance of the hormone in order to process sugar, resulting in exceptionally high levels of insulin in the blood.

When we drink alcohol and change our blood sugar levels, this triggers impacts in insulin production, especially when we already have an insulin response problem, as women with PCOS do.

Does alcohol affect hormone levels?

Alcohol consumption affects hormones negatively. It increases estrogen levels and causes progesterone levels to sink.

Since hormone levels are already a factor with PCOS, leading to menstrual irregularities and other painful symptoms, many women decide that these alcohol risks are not worth it.

Does alcohol affect fertility for women with PCOS?

Anyone hoping to have a baby soon or someday should be aware that alcohol can affect fertility in anyone, including women with PCOS.

Alcohol use in general makes it harder to get pregnant, and even after stopping alcohol use, some women’s fertility may be impacted in the longer term by having used alcohol in excess.

Alcohol is believed to reduce the number of eggs a woman has in her ovarian reserve, and also affects menstrual cycle and ovulation. Alcohol also disturbs estrogen and progesterone levels.

Should you stop drinking alcohol if you have PCOS?

Choosing to stop drinking alcohol is a highly personal decision. Only you can look into your heart and know whether you are willing and ready to give up the socially lubricating or emotionally-numbing effects of alcohol, and to find different ways to live happily, without that particular substance being in your life. The path of sobriety is beautiful, rewarding, and at times difficult, even when we have really good reasons to be sober.

We here at Villa Kali Ma favor sobriety highly. In our opinion, life sober is better for a million reasons. Physical health and taking good care of our precious bodies is only one of them. We also count brighter minds, more loving hearts, connected spirits, and meaningful lives (all things considered!) as privileges we earn through protecting our sobriety first and foremost.

For women with PCOS, there seem to be many advantages to taking alcohol out of your diet if you can. Alcohol’s effects on blood sugar levels, liver, hormones, and mood alone are good enough reasons to boot it out of your body. An extra consideration for your decision process, if you do have PCOS, is that many mainstream Western medications, including the diabetes medication Metformin, are rendered essentially ineffective by alcohol, or may have negative interactions.

All in all, each woman must decide for herself what her relationship to alcohol will be. Life is designed to be challenging no matter what, with or without alcohol. But we have many choices that can strengthen or weaken us, including the option to limit known negative factors that just make everything worse.

Villa Kali Ma Can Assist Women With Alcohol Addiction

At Villa Kali Ma, we specialize in helping women to recover from trauma, addiction and mental and emotional pain, freeing them up to live happy, wakeful lives in sobriety.

We offer addiction and mental health recovery programs to treat substance abuse and co-occurring mental health disorders, as well as trauma, in dedicated holistic facilities that unite the best of Western approaches with ancient practices like Yoga and Ayurveda.

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

Dangers of Non-Alcoholic Beer

Spring is here!

What do you associate with spring? We here at Villa Kali Ma think of many sweet and lovely things: cool green grass under our bare toes, the morning sun, and fresh winds in the blooming trees.

Spring signals the return to the vivacity of sleeping creatures. It’s a humming, alive time of year. The season of birds, bees, and…uh oh, BBQs!

That’s right, spring marks the beginning of the season of outdoor gatherings. Of course, they’re fun and wonderful too, but outdoor gatherings can be surprisingly hard to navigate.

Family, friends, groups, the renewing energies of fun in the sun after months of indoor time – these are potentially tricky for people in a personal change process.

For any on a path of recovery from trauma, mental illness, and/or addiction, this 2024 brink-of-spring moment is a perfect time to pause and reflect on set intentions, and strategize:

How can we best keep to our true heart’s intentions of sobriety, self-love, and sanity, in the face of many triggers and distractions? What temptations to self-destroy should we realistically prepare for, during this seemingly bright season? How can we keep a joyful, heartful life front and center?

Want a non-brewski?

This spring, you might get offered a non-alcoholic beer at a gathering.

Non-alcoholic beer is a type of beer with little to no alcohol content. It is intended to mimic the smell and taste of beer, without the same levels of alcohol.

Many household name beer brands offer a non-alcoholic version of their product, intended to serve the market of people who are trying to reduce their alcohol intake without having to give up the pleasures and social purposes of drinking beer.

Non-alcoholic beer is sometimes thought of as a safe alternative to alcoholic beer, though this isn’t true for women who have a history of alcohol addiction, nor for women who are pregnant. Before assuming that non-alcoholic beer is a safe choice for you, it’s probably best to inform yourself as to the full picture!

What is non-alcoholic beer?

Non-alcoholic beer is created in the same way as ordinary beer, through a fermentation process called brewing, which converts sugars into ethanol and carbon dioxide. In non-alcoholic beer, an additional step is added to the process, wherein the alcohol is removed or reduced at the end.

The process of making a beverage created through fermentation has less alcohol is achieved by filtering the alcoholic liquid out, and then adding sugars, flavorings, and carbonated liquid back in.

From a sheerly nutritional standpoint, non-alcoholic beer is not a healthy beverage, due to the re-addition of sugars and “flavors”, many of which are artificial, added through chemical processes or compounds.

The carbohydrate content of non-alcoholic beer is higher in comparison to alcoholic beer. Carbohydrates are considered by nutritionists to be problematic in excess (hence the widespread dietary recommendation to consume less carbohydrates). Because of the extra sugars and flavors, non-alcoholic beer tends to have more calories than true beer.

What are the possible dangers of non-alcoholic beer?

There are two big dangers of non-alcoholic beer for women, especially those of us who are walking a path of recovery from traumatization, addiction, or mental health struggles.

1. Oops, May Contain Alcohol

The term “non-alcoholic” is misleading. By law, a product can still be called non-alcoholic even if it has up to .5% alcohol by volume. If it is marketed as being fully “alcohol-free”, a product is required by the FDA to be at 0.0%, with zero detectable levels of alcohol in the product.

FDA regulations notwithstanding, critics of non-alcoholic and alcohol-free beer have noted that around 25% of products tested independently come up as having higher alcohol content than reported on their label. There is a realistic chance of the presence of some small percentage of alcohol in non-alcoholic and even alcohol-free beer.

What’s the big deal? Well, for those with an addiction history, any, even a very tiny amount of alcohol can awaken an insatiable, relentless craving for more, which inevitably leads to one place only.

2. May Be A Road to Relapse

Any amount of alcohol can reorient the body to crave alcohol again. It is a property of addiction that a woman’s body and brain are irreversibly changed so that even after many years of sobriety, a tiny trace amount of alcohol will trigger the body to want more alcohol.

What typically happens then, is that a person finds herself drinking non-alcoholic beverages in excess, because the thirst for alcohol and all that goes along with inebriation has been stirred. It is then only a matter of time until it will occur to the drinker that non-alcoholic beverages aren’t doing the trick, and a normal beer will start to seem like a good idea.

We think that our wise mind will stop us in time, and occasionally it does, but we can’t rely upon it. Because of the ways that alcohol addiction distorts thoughts, induces intense bodily craving, and erases personal willpower, we will very likely change back to our Addict selves, once the alcohol has been reintroduced.

The other thing to consider is that alcohol and drug relapses can be triggered just by associations, memories, and behavior even without the presence of actual alcohol. Just hanging out “having a beer” (even a fake one), can be enough to open the door to our personal demons again.

Relapse begins long before the actual choice to put chemicals in our bodies again, (as thoughts, attitudes, and behaviors reminiscent of our using or drinking days), so it’s always a good idea to keep one eye on what we’re doing and why.

What are the dangers of non-alcoholic beer during pregnancy?

Because non-alcoholic beer contains some level of alcohol, it represents a risk for fetal alcohol syndrome, and it is not advised for pregnant women for that reason.

There is no established safe level of alcohol consumption for women during pregnancy, and the birth defects associated with alcohol consumption during pregnancy include low birth weight, physical and facial abnormalities, and neurological impacts on the child.

What are alternatives to non-alcoholic beer?

Each woman needs to decide for herself, and no one can do your consciousness-transformation work for you. However, we can always listen to the wisdom and experiences of others and take heed.

At Villa Kali Ma, we recommend staying away from non-alcoholic and even supposedly alcohol-free beer, for the simple reason that it’s not worth the risk.

We have to behave in ways that match our truest and most important intentions and priorities. If being healthy, sane, and sober is a priority for us, then we will naturally shy away from something made to be similar to alcohol by smell and taste.

When hanging out with other people who aren’t on a path of recovery, we need to keep our wits about us, not go foggy and numb, as much as we might want to.

So rather than resorting to saying yes to a non-alcoholic beer this BBQ season, we can take care of ourselves with these three tactics:

1. Set your hang-out plan in advance

Make a less-is-more plan for hanging out, with intention. Decide ahead of time, when in a calm frame of mind: What is a sobriety-safe amount of time to participate in this social gathering? Then stick to your plan no matter what, even if you end up having a better time than you feared.

If your plan goes well this time, and you can have a socially connecting time while staying reasonably centered and mindful, without getting overly triggered during or in the days following the gathering, you can always try hanging out for a longer time the next gathering.


2. Hydrate with Healthy Beverages

A practical hack is to decide to be in charge of bringing a special healthy, hydrating beverage with you to the gathering. Bring plenty for yourself, and others too.

Many delicious, healing tonics can be mixed up with mineral water, fresh limes and lemons, herbs, ginger, and sugar-free juices. Get creative!

For inspiration, you may like some of the ideas here 19 Non-Alcoholic Drink Recipes. For the yogis among us, following the trail of Ayurveda can be rewarding: Ayurveda Drink Recipes.

Sometimes just the fun activity of creating a special offering for the group can be a positive way to focus your energies and stay purposeful and aware. You could also choose to bring a fun party favor to be handed out to people or make a healthy snack.


3. Bring Sober Fun

The “now what do I do?” anxious social gathering moment sometimes precedes an ill-fated choice, made in a sudden blurt just to fill up the awkward space!

Feeling like we don’t belong, making small talk, worrying about what people think of us, and other social discomforts are real triggers.

One cure for this is to bring an activity you would enjoy doing, such as a frisbee or a soccer ball, and bust it out when you need something to give you a positive focus.

A little more investment, but also a lot of fun, are group games, like 20 questions (How to Play 20 Questions), or Celebrity (Celebrity: How to Play the “Celebrity” Party Game).

For inspiration, you can browse team-building games like these:  17 Fun Icebreaker Games for Adults and see what you could adapt for your gathering.

Villa Kali Ma can assist women with alcohol addiction

At Villa Kali Ma, we’re dedicated to helping women recover from addiction to alcohol, drugs, and self-destructive behaviors. We also treat the underlying deep pain and disconnection that leads women into those traps in the first place – the tragic effects of traumatization and mental and emotional suffering that take so many of us off the path of a joyful life.

We want every woman to thrive and to grow up fully into her true big beautiful self!

Check out our many offerings for women, including inpatient and outpatient treatment options, on our facilities page.

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

Alcohol and Domestic Violence in Women

What Is the Link Between Substance Use and Domestic Violence?

Domestic violence, also called Intimate Partner Violence, is closely linked to substance use. Where substance use disorders thrive, so does domestic violence.

Domestic violence includes any behavior or action that takes place in the context of an intimate relationship, which creates harm. This can mean physical harm and sexual violence, as well as emotional harm.

Forms of bodily assault like hitting, slapping, and throwing objects are obvious examples of domestic violence. Forced sexual intercourse, as well as emotionally violent behaviors like controlling another person through monitoring or isolating them from friends, family, and help also counts as partner abuse.

Studies on the topic are difficult to conduct due to the known underreporting of domestic abuse. Domestic violence is estimated to affect 1 in 10 women in America.

If you are experiencing domestic violence it’s important to understand that help is available and that it is possible to find support to remove yourself from that situation. If you’re reading this article for yourself, please consider consulting the domestic violence hotline for direct help with your situation.

Understanding Alcohol Addiction and Misuse

Not everyone who uses substances is also violent. Abusers sometimes explain away their behavior as owing to alcohol or substances but that is not a complete understanding of the nature of the problem. It is true, however, that tendencies towards violent expressions of anger are made worse by substances.

Drugs and alcohol distort people’s thinking and bring out tendencies in behavior that are already in place before substances make these tendencies more dangerous and out of control. Alcohol and drugs are disinhibiting, removing the ability to refrain from impulses that we normally wouldn’t yield to. Where there is a pre-existing pattern of violent tendencies and/or a history of having been abused, these patterns are severely aggravated by substance use.

Alcohol Use Disorder is a clinical umbrella term that covers a spectrum of alcohol-related problems. The range is from those who misuse alcohol (drink to excess, to the point of creating health or social consequences) periodically, to those who are chemically dependent on alcohol, to those who have the full disease of alcoholism, which includes serious degradation and damage to the body, mind, and life of the individual.

Generally, alcohol abuse leads towards dependence, and any alcohol use at all tends, in the main, to lead more quickly or more slowly toward the eventual condition of addiction.

Signs that you have an alcohol use disorder or may have one soon are:

  • you drink despite negative consequences to your life
  • you have cravings and strong urges to drink
  • you have withdrawal symptoms such as trembling hands after stopping drinking
  • you are losing control over your use, such that you drink more in amount or frequency than you mean to, can’t stop, or can’t stay stopped
  • you are “restless, irritable, and discontent” when not drinking, and need to drink to feel normal

What Is the Prevalence of Domestic Violence and Alcohol Addiction?

According to existing studies on the subject, substance abuse is correlated with bringing out dangerous traits, including incidents of intimate partner violence.

A large percentage of those who are violent to their partners also use substances, but not everyone who has a substance use disorder is violent to their partner. Women in the victim role are often also substance users, and women who are abused are more likely to have a substance use disorder than women who are not in an abusive partner relationship.

Men who are violent to their partners are more likely to cause the death of their partner when substance use is also a factor.

What Are the Risk Factors of Alcohol-Related Domestic Violence?

Some factors found to be correlated with alcohol-related domestic violence include:

  • Growing up in a violent household
  • Poverty, unemployment, financial stress
  • Regular use of alcohol to cope with life problems
  • Unplanned pregnancy and family problems
  • Depression and suicidal ideation
  • Anger and hostility
  • A previous history of having been physically abused and/or abusing another person
  • Lacking empathy, antisocial personality traits, aggression
  • Social isolation, disconnection from friends and family
  • Frequent conflict in the relationship
  • A need for excessive control, jealousy, and possessiveness

What Are the Effects of Domestic Violence on Women?

Domestic violence has immediate and long-term effects on women.

In the immediate term, domestic violence impacts women’s health and well-being. The following are the effects of domestic violence on women:

  • Injuries, cuts and bruises
  • Broken bones, damaged organs, and other body parts
  • Sexual trauma and damage to sexual organs
  • Psychological trauma

In the longer term, domestic violence has lasting physical and psychological effects, including:

  • Chronic pain
  • Migraines
  • Sleep disorders
  • Immune system problems
  • Stress
  • Traumatic brain injury
  • Memory problems, problems thinking clearly
  • Depression, anxiety, and PTSD

What Are the Signs of Domestic Violence?

Part of the problem with domestic violence is that women fear the repercussions of speaking up to authorities or even friends or family. Abused women have been taught to expect violence from their partners if they do not keep their secrets and have become used to complying to stay safe.

Women also frequently doubt their own experiences, gaslighting and blaming themselves rather than seeing abuse for what it is. This is what it is, and it’s important not to blame the victim, as becoming excessively insecure, dependent, and frightened is part of the pattern rather than something the woman is doing wrong.

Some signs of being in an abusive relationship include:

  • You feel controlled by your partner
  • Your partner demands that you are always available to them, requiring that you respond immediately to emails, calls, and texts
  • Your partner demands sex or pressures you to have sex, or insists that you get pregnant when you don’t want to
  • Your partner is physically violent with you, and/or uses threats of physical violence to get their way
  • Your partner interferes with, controls, or makes your decisions for you, things like where you spend your money, what you wear, who you see or talk to
  • Your partner is jealous even in innocent situations. Your partner frequently accuses you of cheating or flirting
  • Your partner has frequent and/or sudden outbursts of anger
  • Your partner blames you and makes you responsible for how they feel, especially if they feel jealous or threatened by your independence
  • Your partner threatens, intimidates, and blocks you from making a move to free yourself

Villa Kali Ma Can Assist Women With Alcoholism

If you use alcohol regularly and/or in excess, and you are in a situation where domestic violence is at play, your alcohol use is likely playing a role in keeping you trapped in the situation that is causing you harm.

It is important to know that you are not alone with these troubles and that help exists for you.

Many women who come through our doors needing help for their alcoholism or other substance problems are also fleeing unsafe situations and relationships that have been causing them deep harm at many levels of their being.

Villa Kali Ma is a safe place for women needing refuge and help recovering from destructive tendencies and struggles that are hurting them. We offer mental health, trauma healing, and addiction treatment programs that will help you find the strength to rescue yourself from danger.

References:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8729263/

Categories
Alcohol Addiction

Effects of Alcohol on Women

Why Do Women Face Higher Risks of Alcohol Addiction?

Alcohol has stronger effects on women than on men, due to biological factors like body weight and how much water women’s bodies retain compared to men. These biological distinctions explain why women can tolerate alcohol less easily and will have a higher blood alcohol level than men consuming the same amount of alcohol. Women have a higher likelihood of blacking out from drinking too much and are also more likely to experience hangovers.

What Are the Health Risks for Women Drinking Alcohol?

According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, alcohol presents many health risks for women.

Alcohol Addiction

Primary among the health risks for women who are associated with alcohol use is the risk of developing Alcohol Use Disorder, which is the clinical name for a spectrum of conditions ranging from alcohol abuse (drinking too much periodically) to alcohol dependence, to full-blown alcoholism.
Alcohol addiction is a serious, progressive disease with wide-ranging impacts on physical as well as mental health.


Brain Damage

Alcohol may be more likely to result in brain damage in women than in men, according to the hypotheses of some researchers studying the effects of alcohol on women compared to men.

Alcohol-related blackouts, which create gaps in memory, suggest damage to the areas of the brain responsible for memory. Some researchers believe that there is shrinkage of portions of the brain in people who use alcohol beyond what the body can tolerate safely (which is a daily limit of 1 serving of alcohol).


Breast Cancer

Alcohol has been linked to breast cancer. It appears that women who drink one drink daily have a higher likelihood of developing breast cancer compared with those who do not drink that amount, and that chance increases when women drink even more than one drink daily.


Liver Damage

Alcohol is notorious for leading to liver damage, such as cirrhosis, which is what happens when there is permanent liver scarring due to the use of alcohol. Women who regularly drink more than the body can safely process (again, a daily limit of 1 serving of alcohol) also have a higher risk of developing the potentially life-threatening liver condition of hepatitis.


Alcohol and Pregnancy

Drinking during pregnancy is unsafe for the mother and the infant. Known impacts of drinking during pregnancy include fetal alcohol disorder, higher risk of pre-term labor, brain damage, and physical as well as developmental impairment in children.


Heart Disease

Alcohol use over a long period leads to heart disease. Women are at a greater risk of developing alcohol-induced heart disease than men, even when consuming a lower daily amount than men.

All in all, women experience the adverse health effects of alcohol to a greater degree than men do.

Why Should Women Consider Avoiding Alcohol Use Completely?

Some women choose not to drink at all, and an argument can certainly be made for that choice. It is recommended to avoid alcohol completely if you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant, are under the age of 21 (underage drinking leads to disruption of normal brain development), taking medications that interact negatively with alcohol, or if you have a physical or mental health condition which is made worse by alcohol, such as anxiety or depression.

What Are the Treatment Programs for Alcohol?

Medically Supervised Detoxification

Alcohol represents a danger to your health during the withdrawal process and can result in death if not done with care. Seizures, delirium, and other complications are often part of the process.
It is wisest to detoxify in a medically supervised detoxification facility, especially if you also use medications of any kind in addition to alcohol, as not enough is known about interactions between alcohol and medications, especially ones that haven’t been on the market for so very long. Medical detoxification facilities have nurses and doctors on staff to monitor your withdrawals and provide medical support where necessary and will be able to intervene if something goes wrong.


Inpatient or Residential Treatment (Rehab)

Alcohol treatment is also offered in Inpatient Treatment Programs. These are your classic rehabilitation facilities, where you check in and receive treatment onsite as a stay-away option, usually for a length of time between one and three months.

Inpatient, also called Residential, is the best level of care in most cases of serious alcohol disorders because the safe, sequestered environment is critical to having a chance to stabilize away from temptations and triggers. These facilities also have trained medical staff onsite.


Outpatient Programs (IOP)

It is also possible to attend a day treatment program while still staying in your home and keeping your work schedule if that is advisable in your case.

Intensive Outpatient Programs offer addiction treatment services several days a week including during evening hours. Depending on how much care makes sense in your case, you may want to enroll in a higher or lower degree of structure and supervision to help you have success.

It’s important to understand that your level of care is something to be assessed by a medical professional. Generally speaking, more structure, safety, and length of treatment are better if it is possible to secure that for yourself, as time helps when healing from substance use.

Villa Kali Ma Can Assist Women With Alcohol Addiction

Villa Kali Ma offers addiction and mental health recovery programs for women who suffer from substance abuse and co-occurring disorders. We offer treatment at all levels of care, so whatever your circumstances, you will likely be able to find a program with us that fits your needs.

At Villa Kali Ma, we heal alcohol problems alongside underlying mental and emotional struggles, including traumatization, which is a very common problem for women.

Our facilities are located in sunny Southern California close to San Diego. At the core of our program, we believe in the health and individuality of each woman, and that there are many paths back to wholeness. For that reason, we offer a range of holistic modalities alongside our core treatment program.

References:

https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15303629/

https://www.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/brochures-and-fact-sheets/women-and-alcohol

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